LIVING WITH OTHER PEOPLE: Violence on television only affects children whose parents act like television personalities. Table manners are for people with nothing better to do. Civilization is a religion. Civilized people walk funny. There is always a party going on somewhere. People will remember you better if you wear the same outfit. THE SPACE PEOPLE: Space people read our mail. The Space People think that TV news programs are comedies, and that soap operas are news. The Space People will contact us when they can make money by doing so. The Space People think factories are musical instruments. They sing along with them. Each song lasts from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. No music on weekends. correction: ALLEGED cannibalare socks in fashion this season?the cake wasnt originally meant to be eroticthis lucky quarter is for shitmaybe if i scream at my kids in the lobby of burger king it will help them become better peoplethe music today doesn't make you go crazy and kill people like it use toi can't believe columbia pictures stole my idea for a sequel to men in blackim glad i don't have to look at the passengers in coachi think its great that the media doesn't focus on how bush is crippledboy, you try to have sex with somebody, and suddenly you're hitleri know what you're thinking: "not another miracle oil additive!"i hope we can still be friends who never see each otherwow, that sure was a great black history monthhow come i never got any credit for all the times i DIDN'T run anyone over?lord, please give me a sign if you want me to spare those paperboys in the basementi dare say the dean will be quite flustered by my cheeky send-up of him in the campus humor magazineis that all i am to you? the man that installed your carpet?losing money at that casino sure was fun!its not just a pony. its a MAGIC pony!10 more years and i can totally outlive jesusim thinking about getting into self-mutilationcongress must be so stoned to come up with all those cool lawsif you're going to laugh at me, perhaps i won't seduce you at allhow come its always me who should be ashamed of myself?ive got a salt toothi learned the hard way that falconry isn't something you just pick upi wonder what happened to that space program we had back in the 60'safganistan's budding provisional parliamentary democracy is an inspiration is budding provisional parliamentary democracies everywhereim sorry to hear about your father's death, but we need to break upi feel really bad about strangling that puppy