i feel like everything is eating up inside of me....no not a sickness well not physical anyways..this insanity growing inside my heart which was once so pure but corrupted from this odd world....to live in this dark insanity is killing me on the inside as it eats on my heart and changes it. i think what am i to do anymore? what am i supposed to believe? mainly what am really to feel? i do not feel like loving i honestly don't know what to do anymore it is not anger i feel....no i might be a mean person but only to myself i am mean to...sadness? no i do not really feel that way deppressed? could be but of what? that is truly the question it usually was cause of love and heart ache but i pushed that off...now its something new that is eating me up inside i do not even know anymore. everything is blur to me like i have had too much to drink and i cannot really see straight....this is not something normal...for this is new what i feel it could be depression after all but yet...everything is eating up in me tearing apart i fall into a darkness staring into that same darkness and thinking constantly of anything that comes to mind and the questions it like why am i here does not make sense i let this dark depressing feeling succumb me and take control of me for which i do not even know myself at all......
again this is just a journal/poem i guess if you can call it of something is in my head...well if you like awesome if you don't i understand take care...
