BITCH 4 LIFE's blog: "confused!!"

you know I have now decided I want more out of my life then I get. I want a man to love me and my kids. I want my kids to be happy. I think I want my husband to grow up and know that he has a family that needs him. Then i want my fuck friend to decide if he wants more then a fuck casue i do i want to be happy I want to grow old with someone and i want this now I don't want to wait till I am 90 to get this..I just want my life back and is it so hard to ask for love..I mean I know that love is a strong word but I know that i need it and want it in my life..GOD what is wrong with me

Sat. 3-24-07 was the hardest day of my life..I went down to see my husband so my son could see him and I said to you all that i don't want him back and i don't but it hurt to see him...then all we did was fight and he said that he loved me but i know he don't i know that he don't love anyone but himself then i see the guy that i like and i was a bitch i don't know why but i know that i may never see him again cause of it and that hurts too but the hunny wants a devorice then he don't so i have no clue what to do or say hell maybe if i am lucky i will just pick up and move from this area all together....

I just wanted to let you all know that I made up my mind...i am goin to sign the devorice papers cause I know that i can do better and desirve better..so if you know any single good guys let me know cause I am ready to move on...

ok here is the thing i got married 4-10-06..we are not together anymore but the other day i got a call from him that he wants me to come down and sigh devorice papers..this is after we have given it chance after chance to make it work but he always leaves nothin new there i mean i don't want to be with him anymore but i am not sure i want a devorice yet what do i do? i am so confused. i mean i met a nice guy but he don't want a relationship right now cause he is goin throw the same thing that i am and i understand that but i really just don't think that i am ready for a devorice please help what do i do??????