(C) 2010 by rmsl

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To Be Broken Or Torn

Cory called Leigh on Friday and on Saturday but there was no answer. On Sunday he decided to drive over her house and surprise her. Plus, he was getting a little worried. What was it that she hadn’t told him yet?

When he pulled into her driveway he could tell no one was home. The windows were dark and the purplish drapes on the picture window were down and closed. And the driveway wasn’t shoveled. A chill went down Cory’s back. Did Leigh move?

He thought about it all Sunday night. He tried to write but he couldn’t help thinking about what Leigh didn’t want to tell him. And when he called her there was no answer. He dismissed her moving because he figured she wouldn’t leave without telling him. He forced himself to not think the worst. She must have gone on a trip with her dad. But what happened on Monday?

Sleep didn’t come easy that night but he finally fell asleep. School started again the next day and he guessed he would see Leigh tomorrow.

 

Cory couldn’t help himself from thinking the worst now. She hadn’t been at Leigh’s Stage and wasn’t in English class. After school he went to the gym and asked the set crew if they knew anything. Someone said she was absent. Cory was really worried now.

When Kym came over to ask for a ride home he didn’t hear her right away. She looked unsettled as well. On the way out to his car, she told him that in a month or so her orthodontist was going to break her jaw and realign it to fix her slight overbite. Cory never noticed an overbite.

“Yeah, he says if I don’t get it done now, my jaw will give me problems with my teeth as I get older. I’ll be out of school for two weeks.”

Cory took in the information like he was a computer. He heard it, processed it, and didn’t show any emotion at all. She looked so scared. But he couldn’t feel sorry for her, because for some reason he feared Leigh was going through something much worse at the moment.

Before Kym got out of his car she said, “Don’t look so worried, Cory. I’ll be all right.”

Cory wasn’t thinking about Kym’s jaw but her voice broke his trance. Did Leigh get sick like her mom did? He recuperated from his horrible train of thought and looked into her eyes. They looked bluer than usual and for a few minutes he forgot about Leigh entirely.

“I won’t see you for two weeks, huh?”

She rapidly shook her head. “No way. I’ll be all swollen and ugly.”

Cory smiled soothingly. “Ah, come on. You know I wouldn’t care if you shaved your head and—”

“…painted purple stars on it. I know. But…” she paused and looked out the window of her door. “We’ll see, okay?”

As soon as she got inside her house, Cory drove away in the direction of Leigh’s house. There was a car in the driveway. Cory sighed. At least they hadn’t moved.

He felt weird knocking on the door. It felt like he was intruding on some family situation that he had no business to be butting around in.

When Mr. Reynolds opened the door the strange feeling vanished. He smiled at him and Cory felt for a second that all his worrying about Leigh was pointless. But then his smile faded and a stern, serious look replaced the friendly greeting. “She didn’t tell you, did she? Cory, Leigh Ann’s in the hospital.”

 

Mr. Reynolds was on his way back to the hospital. He only came home to get Leigh her play notebooks and her copy of Romeo and Juliet. She had forgotten her bag in the morning, which was completely understandable.

Cory was too shocked to talk during the ride to the hospital. He was glad that Mr. Reynolds volunteered information on Leigh’s hospital stay without prompting. Cory thought it helped him to talk about it. It also sounding like it was the first time he ever talked about it to anyone else, including Leigh. His words were shaky and seemed to bring up memories long concealed.

Mr. Reynolds told him that Leigh had a tumor in her heart. A cardiac myxoma.

“Cancer?” Cory blurted out.

“No, no. Nobody knows how the tumor forms…but it’s benign. Leigh’s been observed for the condition…ever since…Addison…her mother died from it three years ago.”

Cory felt like his heart was going to explode. He began to sweat and his eyes watered. “So Leigh’s gonna die?”

Her dad laughed. Cory thought it was an odd reaction considering the situation. “Addison’s tumor blocked a heart valve…and it caused irregular heart beats. She just thought she was overworked…performing too much, so she ignored the fevers and her being tired so much. None of us had any idea when it happened. One minute she was playing the piano with Leigh and the next…”

As he talked about it more, his expression lightened and Cory could tell that the conversation had made him feel much better. Cory envied the Reynolds. They opened themselves up so easily when they wanted to. Cory couldn’t even tell Kym that he liked her more than just a friend. But he didn’t think much about Kym then. He only wanted to see Leigh.

Mr. Reynolds went on to tell Cory that Leigh should be perfectly fine. The surgery went well without any complications. The removal of the tumor was a simple enough surgery, but when dealing with the heart no one really knew what could go wrong. Plus, the tumor was small. Her doctor noticed it on her last checkup and immediately scheduled the surgery. The chances of the tumor coming back were rare, but she would continue her annual checkups.

That visit to the hospital was scary. Even though Leigh’s doctor told both of them that everything was going as projected and Leigh was reacting beautifully to the medications and post-treatments, she wasn’t awake when they got there. The doctor said she needed her rest and was on sedatives to sleep but would soon come out of it.

The next day at school was horrible. He told Jason what had happened and all he could do was wait for the last bell. He met Mr. Reynolds at the hospital after school.

“She’s awake and talking. You can go in and see her now,” Mr. Reynolds said when he first saw him without any formal greeting.

Leigh looked pale and weak. But her eyes were wide open and she was sitting up with the aid of the motorized bed. As soon as she saw him she smiled as largely as she could. Her large mouth and wide eyes had grown on Cory so much that they immediately energized him and he couldn’t help from laughing. Just like Mr. Reynolds on the first car ride to the hospital.

After a few minutes of conversation and Cory could tell that Leigh was regaining her strength and vitality every second, he let the anger he had been unconsciously hiding over the last few days show.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Do you know what I’ve been going through? I thought you moved or…or worse.”

She just kept smiling at him. Lightheartedly she said, “Yeah, I’ve had a bad couple of days as well.”

Cory’s anger faded and was replaced by embarrassment. Could he have been any more selfish at that moment?

“It’s okay, Cory. I should’ve told you. I wanted to, but I couldn’t. It’s stupid, but I wanted to face this alone.”

“But why? I mean, you have your dad.”

“But you’re different. I needed to do it by myself.” She looked down at her hands. She had limited movement because of all the wires and clamps on her fingers. “It’s just like when I entered the poetry contest or joined set crew. It’s for the same reason why I’m gonna try out for Juliet.”

Cory just stared at her.

Leigh sighed. “But look, I know it was stupid now. I should have told you. I know you don’t understand but—” her smile faded and was replaced by the most serious look he ever saw on her face. “I promise I’ll never so something so stupid again.”

It made him feel special, like she never looked at anyone that way before, and his uneasiness and any signs of anger vanished. He didn’t understand why she didn’t tell him and figured he probably never would. He was just so relieved that she would be okay.

On the way home from the hospital that day, Cory experienced an overwhelming amount of guilt. His chest felt tight and his stomach queasy. He almost pulled over. How could he ever be upset about possibly not making the baseball team or finishing second in everything he did or if Kym never returned his feelings? He was a selfish person. Leigh was in the hospital, surviving a heart disease that killed her mom, Kym was about to have her jaw broken, and what about the other people who suffered from hunger, disease, and homelessness in world. He knew he was taking his guilt to extremes, but for the first time in his life he hated himself—he hated feeling sorry for himself when he had such a great life.

 

During the next two weeks, Cory tried to go to Leigh’s Stage with Jason. But it didn’t work. He kept teaching him Shakespeare and helping him with the rewrite of his paper, but Leigh’s presence was missed. There were no new characters of Leigh’s to laugh at or practicing lines from Romeo and Juliet. It felt like doing homework.

He visited Leigh in the hospital every day she was in and brought her her homework. Sometimes they read lines, but even the visiting hours were interrupted with nurses and doctors checking on Leigh and administering medication and meals that made practicing difficult.

Leigh didn’t seem to mind, though. She smiled from the time Cory came through the door to the time he left. Even though Leigh was recovering from heart surgery, Cory felt better when he was with her.

On the day of her return to school, Cory didn’t expect her to make Leigh’s Stage. She was later than usual, but when she walked back into the alumni room it was like she never left. Her energy and laughter picked up right where she left off and soon the three of them were giggling and reading and dressing up like Shakespearean characters.

It was getting closer to baseball tryouts and Leigh’s audition so she spent more time watching the movements of the Juliets’ in the movies and his workouts intensified and lengthened.

She suggested that they go to The Stage after school from now on so they both could practice a little more and still read Shakespeare. The Shakespeare section of their English class had long passed, but they began reading his other plays and acting out each scene as best as they could. Jason agreed to Leigh’s Stage after school and soon it was all they even talked about.

Cory’s mom got mad at him the few times he forgot to take home Bobby and Kevin. But they both got their driver’s licenses and were driving to school before it became a real issue with his mom.

Soon baseball tryouts were only two weeks away. Leigh stopped going into the alumni room during the mornings and helped Cory with his workouts. She wore a powered blue baseball cap with a clothing line logo on it with her long straight hair in a ponytail through the opening in the back. The tank top and shorts she wore showed she was in better shape than Cory had ever thought. She helped with ground ball drills and timing his sprints and L’s. She also was able to toss badminton birdies to him so he could work on his hitting and making contact. But that was about it.

Cory realized why she never tried out for basketball. He tried not to laugh or smile when she tried to do something athletic but sometimes he couldn’t help himself.

Everything in Cory’s world seemed to be fitting into place. He would make the varsity baseball team and Leigh would get the role of Juliet in the spring play. Not to mention, he felt Kym was beginning to have feelings for him. But he didn’t want to ruin it by rushing it or pushing it. It had to happen on its own.

 

Joey stopped messing with Cory ever since the fake scholarship letter. He even talked to him normally a few times and joked with him. Gwen, however, stayed humbled for only a few weeks. She began treating everyone the same way she did before even though occasionally someone would make a donkey joke. These jokes never bothered Joey and half the time he seemed too preoccupied to be concerned with anything going on around him.

The gossip the fake scholarship letters generated took its time, but by then everybody in the school knew about it. The comments and jokes seemed to increase daily since the boys’ varsity basketball team lost in the second round of the state tournament but nothing ever materialized and Joey regularly made jokes of his own. The way he handled it was heroic in Cory’s eyes.

It was three days until baseball tryouts when the jokes climaxed. Students were in the gym like they always were after school hanging out, flirting, and waiting for rides. The cheerleaders were practicing for their upcoming competition. Kym and Joey were sitting the bleachers watching when it happened.

Leigh, Jason, and Cory were on their way down to the alumni room when, from the balcony above the foyer leading outside of the gym, a giant banner was dropped. On it was a giant donkey, poorly painted, eating grass. Instead of the words “You’re An Ass” printed on it, below the patch of grass were the words, “At Least You Don’t Choke On Grass.” Under one of the donkey’s hooves was a deflated basketball.

Cory searched for Joey when the mob of students began laughing and hollering. Joey didn’t seem to notice what was going on. He continued to talk to Kym who looked visibly upset. Joey didn’t look at the banner until he was half way to the locker room doors and even than he didn’t look at it long. After Joey left her, Kym dashed outside.

Cory gave Leigh a pleading look and without saying anything they both made their way to the top of the balcony. They ripped the banner down to boos and other insulting remarks. Jason ran to the banner and began crumpling it up as much as he could. Cory and Leigh soon joined him and they walked the banner outside and threw it out in the dumpster on the side of the building.

Cory and Leigh remained silent as they walked to Leigh’s Stage. Cory knew she felt bad. Jason talked about how he thought they were both so awesome for tearing the banner down. They had stopped talking about getting revenge on Joey and Gwen well before the letters showed up. He never knew they were indirectly responsible for it in the first place.

“Jase, that’s enough.”

When they reached the door to the alumni room it was shut. The door being shut didn’t surprise them at all; it was the sounds Leigh heard inside the room that made them all step back.

“Somebody’s going off in there.”

They listened as closely as they could. The voice was definitely male and it sounded pretty angry. Cory heard some curse words and then a loud bang as if somebody threw something against the wall.

At first it didn’t register, but then Cory and Leigh looked at each other with disbelief. It couldn’t be.

“I’ll go talk to him,” Cory said.

He moved towards the door. Leigh stepped in front of him. “No, I should go. It was my idea in the first place.”

“But—” Leigh had already opened the door and walked in. She shut the door behind her. Cory tried to listen but he couldn’t hear a thing.

Cory expected Joey to come storming out after him or at least Leigh would come back out after a few seconds or so. But she stayed in there for what seemed like hours. Actually, it was only about fifteen minutes but as each minute ticked away he began to fear Joey had hurt Leigh or something. He didn’t like her in that room alone.

Just as he reached for the handle, Joey came out. He didn’t seem mad and his expression was rather pleasant. He smirked at Cory. “Thanks for taking the banner down, dude.” And he walked away.

Cory couldn’t wait to hear what had happened. He went into the room and Leigh was sitting on one of the couches with her head down. She didn’t look okay.

Leigh asked Jason to wait outside for a few minutes so they could talk privately. Jason understood because he put the pieces together as to why the banner had effected them so much.

“Are you okay? You don’t look so good. Does your chest hurt or something? Did he hurt you?” He sat down next to her on the couch.

“He thought you wrote the letters.”

Cory had feared as much. “He told Kym didn’t he?”

“No. He never told her. Or anyone. He’s actually a pretty sensitive guy.”

Cory was growing impatient. Why wasn’t she telling him what happened? What Joey said? “He didn’t seem mad anymore, though. I guess the banner was the last straw. It just broke him down.” When Leigh didn’t say anything, Cory stood up. “Well, come on, Leigh. Tell me what happened.”

She looked up at him. The color in her cheeks was returning and the left side of her mouth started to smile. “He wasn’t upset at all about the banner.”

“Really? What else could make Joey Vaudester so upset?”

“He’s in love with Kym.”

Cory’s heart broke. He realized that other guys had feelings for Kym but he never heard one of them say he loved her. Pins and needles pressed at his skin and his heartbeat quickened. “So they’re in love. That’s a strange way of showing it.”

Leigh swallowed. “She broke up with him in the gym.”