Someones Prized Posession's blog: "Things My heart is thinking and my mind will not follow..."

You can't think how I depend on you, and when you're not there the colour goes out of my life.

It seems as though every time some thing goes right for me,. three things fall apart on me. I find that no matter what I do life throws a curve ball at me. I know that life will never be a bowl of cherries, but I hope that one day life will just stop being a moldy loaf of bread for me. I have been hit hard and fast by sadness today, I wish that my tears were non existant. I feel trapped in my own saddness and tears and there is no escape in sight. I believe that somewhere there is an end to this tunnel, and there is light at the other end of it, but will I have the strength to make it to that light is my only question. Why woun't live just stop throwing curve balls at me?

I wake up everyday and I see a person next to me that makes me believe anything is possible if you just believe in it. Thing is I had him in my grasp before and I faultered in my ability to hold him strong enough and close enough that he slipped through my fingers. Now I have opened my eyes and he is there, he is giving me everything there is to give, he is giving me all of him. My heart knows that what he has to give ios real and pure, but my mind sits there and wonders is this just an elaberate dream my mind has concockted to keep me happy, and I have just not awoken from it yet. I want to believe that my heart is right and my mind is just trying to put dought in the air to keep me safe. If this is a dream I pray to never wake, If this is reality I pray my heart will break the bonds of fear that are torturing me. AM I DREAMING

An Angel kissed my tears away today when I was sad. I wasn't feeling quite myself my day had been so bad. I felt a warmth brush by me that quickly dried my tears. A gentle, kind, and loving touch that seemed to hold me near. Immediately, I felt so much better and the day seemed brighter too. I guess that's just the way you feel when an Angel comforts you.

I woke up today thinking that the world was a bright place that would teach me what I needed to know if I would just stop and listen. As the morning furthered on I felt the love of two people surrounding me. They gave it seemingly unconditionally. I sat back and wondered can I give love that openly, that unconditionally. Can I ever feel like I am safe enough with myself to feel safe enough with there love in my hands. Then I realized that there love was in my hands because they put it there because they trusted me with it. The trusted and believed that I would nurish and help both different loves grow. because each that was given to me was very very different. I ended up being torn from both of them today and as I got further away from them I realized that my heart was breaking because I was walking away from the treasure that they both gave me. I feared the treasure and in that fear I would not allow myself to grasp it. I want to hold it strong and confidently, but I ask myself can I do that. I want them to be happy, but what if I am incapable of making anyone happy. The treasure of my heart always seems to bring heart break. I will have to stop thinking for a moment and just feel, and when feeling I will have to put my foot out where it seems there is no ground and believe that if the ground is not there, he will be tbhere having grown wings to catch me so I will not fall. Because truely the broken hearted treasure is the heart that is mended by the pure love you allow yourself to be given.