I use to write all the time on MySpace when it first came around, but those days have come and passed. My stories where those of humor and true but funny things I've noticed about the world. Many many people would comment me on how hard they would laugh about my writings, and they could never get enough. Have you asked yourself why I'm telling you all this yet? What does all this have to do with my blog title "How fucked up is this world..."? Well here is the answer: I don't write about those things anymore probably due to growing a bit older and noticing my surroundings (my world) closer than what I use to see them as. Specially after joining the military which most def took the candy coding off of many of the things I use to enjoy, but we will come back to this a bit later. Basically what I am saying is how many times have you or someone you know have been at the top of their game, or raised above all the bullshit in their lives to become happy for that short period of time just to fall right back into their miserable crap again, possibly and likely now which is twice as bad as it once was? If thats happened to you or your in the middle of this right now then keep reading, otherwise if your one of those completely happy people that don't ever seem to feel like this (which I'm jelous as hell of) then you probably don't care about all this crap.
How many times have you thought that someone has had your back such as a friend, girlfriend or vice versa just to leave your ass high and dry like it never fucking mattered to them in the first place? How many times have you sacrificed and gave everything you have to someone because they mean that much to you just to have them walk away in the end? Does anyone else ever feel like unless your hot shit that you seem to have to settle for the people around you and attempt to tell yourself that your ok? What about existing?... Why do I feel like there is really nothing out there in this world except for the same old shit that we all do in our own home towns (going out to eat, movies, games, drink, maybe drugs, sex, a sport) just different locations? I joined the military to attempt to get away and it seems as if I went to one hell to another, same exact stuff, just different location. Even when I was overseas what did everyone wanna do? Drink... In Italy there was booze... In Bahrain there was booze... In France there was booze... In Rome there was booze... I think there is just somthing wrong with me, like I'm searching for some sort of answer that nobody can give me. Yeah when it comes to my case I know part of the problem is that I just don't like myself, but still I search. Am I the only person that feels like this? Completely alone, slaving to the green bill just to piss it away in seconds to fit in with society? As if there is truely no good people out there that will tell you they will never leave and they love you, but actually mean it and stick to their word?
Had enough of my bitching yet? Yeah, bitching... thats exactly what all this is. Now here is the candy coding that I mentioned earlyer. Everything that I feel, that makes me miserable and want out of this life, is the fucking candy. Even though I know this, I still feel like I can't help myself, and thats pathetic. Wanna real problem? How about war. How about starving third world countries. How about people who have become the victims of crime and drunk drivers and murders. How about people that become terminally ill. People that have families and go to fight a war for everyfuckingone else who takes their freedoms for granted just to come home to their wife with a mouth full of cock. The list can go on forever; these are real problems. And yet in my head none of it matters. My problem? A girl... One that turns my world upside down and just makes me feel destroyed from the inside out. So tell me, anyone, am I fucked up? Or is there anyone else out there that feels or thinks like I do?
