and that's how the fight got started!
My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in
bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"
>
> "No," she answered.
>
> I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
>
> She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
>
> So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
>
> And that's how the fight got started.....
>
>
>
> After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my Driver's' license to
verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at
home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home
and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my
shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your
chest is proof enough for me,' and she processed my Social Securit! y
application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience
at the Social Security Office.
> She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
Disability, too'
>
> And that's how the fight got started......
>
>
>
>
>
> Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed
the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the
truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was
blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and
discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the
house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my
wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather
out there is terrible.'
> My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is
out fishing in that?'
> > And that's how the fight got started.....
>
>
>
>
>
> My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
> 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't
been sober since.'
> 'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating
that long?'
>
>
> And that's how the fight got started...
>
>
>
> I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order
first.
>
> 'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'
>
> The waiter said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'
>
> 'Nah, she can order for herself.'
>
>
>
> And that's how the fight got started....
>
>
>
>
>! ;
> A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy
with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old,
fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
> The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's darn near perfect.'
>
> And that's how the fight got started......
