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will its clear i will be all by myself i will never ever find anyone to love me very time i find someone they say about going for cofee or ect... i triered of all the lies from males to me and never keep there promise . do not have no atracktion with fat , aguly, ect...... i trtierd of being hurt i just wish i get my divorce then and my kids move out and my neice then i can just lock myself in my house for good and do bother nobody and nobody bothers me i am not getting young i getting older going to be 45y 7 mouths and still do not have nobody so mite as will give up . i cant trust nobody becuase i have my back stab to many times and heart brokin . theres time i want to be dead because all my life i been hurting people hurt me though my whole life. i hate my life and what become of it and someone told me it no over the hurt ect... like i sais in my last blog there no man want a woman with kids and having to much prombles in that woman life and i know mine will never end . i should just dig a whole and bruy my self mite smille and seems to be happy but deep in side i am hurting real bad its eating me a live in side me not to many people know not even my counarler .i have more stuff that bortheing me . and i know i will never find happyness no more
