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I dont even know how to begin this blog, I just know that I need to say whats on my mind before it eats its way any deeper than it already has.
If you ask anyone who has had a bad relationship 'What was the problem? What happened?' the first thing out of thier mouth 99% of the time will be either: #1-Shes a crazy bitch OR #2-Hes a total asshole. Not many people can accept the role they played in the destruction of thier former romance. I however, am not such a person. I know where I fucked up and I know what mistakes I made. The problem for me is that I have owned up and have apologized and have asked for forgivness for the wrongs I have done....but he still refusses to see that he was a part of it too and that totally pisses me off!
I was 4 months pregnant with his kid and, not 2 hours after he and I had sex, I found him having sex-and I mean literally in the middle of banging his ex-in the back of his car the night before our ultrasound appointment. She had no idea who I was or knew anything about the baby. ASSHOLE Everything that happened from then on out was just a snowball of lies and mis-trust and irrational behavior on both our parts.
Even to this day he cant be honest with me. I have found out that while he was with me there were others he was seeing, at one point in time SIX other women he was seeing! Mostly short term internet hookups. It sends chills up my spine to think, if I know of six, how many more do I not know about?
