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BLACKMAKO's blog: "A dark night"

created on 04/16/2008  |  http://fubar.com/a-dark-night/b207883
Here are a few words from ol' Hank that have been bouncing around in my brain. So many things have happened in my life recently that it is not always easy to keep things clear. Trying to focus on the things that are important and filter out the crap that is not. There are so many choices in our lives that we make, even when we know the consequences are painful. Sometimes the lines get blurred between right and wrong. Not all of us have the same values or understanding. Things can spiral out of control. You try and hold .. the spin, but thats all part of the ride. We must accept the consequences of our actions and move on. We must find that inner strength, that courage to stand up and face whatever lies ahead. There are so many futures what is the correct path to choose? I think that these futures change with our understanding of ourselves and who we are and who we become. All of this is inexorably tied to our actions. to the choices we make. How do you know you've made the right choice? I suppose you always do know deep down. It's hard sometimes to hear that inner voice but if you listen carefully you can hear it. We all know what is right and wrong on a primitive level. You feel it in your gut. The guilt and stress from making the wrong choice comes from knowing you went against that voice. i try not to go against it to listen to it and find guidance that helps me understand those choices and their consequences. Sometimes I turn to Henry Rollins and his insight. Here are a few little gems that are totally unrelated but are very profound. I am ready for whatever's coming. I expect nothing but to be let down or turned away. I am alone. Goddamn. The shit hurts sometimes, but I realize what I am, what I have become. The alien man waved his arms up and down and noticed that he couldn't wave in the right language so he stopped. Go without a coat when it's cold; find out what cold is. Go hungry; keep your existence lean. Wear away the fat, get down to the lean tissue and see what it's all about. The only time you define your character is when you go without. In times of hardship, you find out what you're made of and what you're capable of. If you're never tested, you'll never define you character. I take what I do seriously. I love it and I want to do well at it and work hard. But I'm not serious about everything I do. Want a good body? Work at it. Want to be a success? Work at it. Want to be truly exceptional? Be a touch insane...You need a little bit of insanity to do great things. Scar tissue is stronger than muscle tissue-you're turning me into scar tissue-I don't know if I should thank you or myself. Half of life is fucking up - the other half is dealing with it. It'll destroy you if you try to make it mean anything to anyone but yourself. The best revenge is to survive yourself. The scars will take me far, they always do. I think about the meaning of pain. Pain is personal. It really belongs to the one feeling it. Probably the only thing that is your own. I like mine. I believe that one defines oneself by reinvention. To not be like your parents. To not be like your friends. To be yourself. To cut yourself out of stone. Keep your blood clean, your body lean, and your mind sharp. As miserable as life may be I hold it pretty precious... Scar tissue is stronger than regular tissue. Realize the strength, move on. Don't do anything by half. If you love someone, love them. If you hate someone, hate them until it hurts. It's hard to get along with people. As much as you try to like them and accept them as individuals, it becomes difficult because they keep getting out of line and wasting your time
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