IT'S THINGS TO PONDER THURSDAY! * FIRST OF THREE ** 1. Is there another word for synonym? 2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. 3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? 5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. 6. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman,"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. 7. Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as ghosts but as mattresses? 8. If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? 9. If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him...is he still wrong? 10. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? 11. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. 12. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do"practice?" 13. Where do forest rangers go to"get away from it all?" 14. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant? 15. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? ************************************** HOPE YOU HAVE A GRINNIN' THOUGHTFUL THURSDAY!
While enjoying an early morning breakfast in a northern Arizona cafe, four elderly ranchers were discussing everything from cattle, horses, and weather, to how things used to be in the"good old days."Eventually the conversation moved on to their spouses. One gentleman turned to the fellow on his right and asked,"Roy, aren't you and your bride celebrating your fiftieth wedding anniversary soon?""Yup, we sure are," Roy replied."Well, are you gonna do anything special to celebrate?" another man asked. The old gentleman pondered this for a moment, then replied,"For our twenty-fifth anniversary, I took Bea to Tucson. Maybe for our fiftieth, I'll go down there and get her." ******** HAVE A TERRIFIC TUESDAY!
