I'm 21 years old, I love romantic walks in the hood, stalking women, making a fool out of myself in front of your family, imbarassing people in public, Playing homeless to get my money for colt and crack... No the real me is... I only like happy people, anyone else can have a glass of go-fuck-yourself. I'm not really big on small talk, unless its "Hey do you like hotels?"...and then I'm in. I am an aspiring stand up comic, I figure, my life is just one big joke mine as well make fun of it. I like to get to know women, and trying to figure them out, like for instance why do women have to go to the bathroom with each other, so I tried it out with one of my friends, but he just told me to go check my vagina, what ever the fuck that means. Well women go in there for such a long time and it just bothers me to know, its like they are playing wheres waldo, I don't know if whether I want in on the finding of that skinny bastard, or if I want to be waldo. But I came to conclusion that they are just trying to see what different shapes they trim on their "special places" for guys its "have to pay to get touched places". "Hey Trish I made a landing strip, oh my god chrissy I shaved a V." Then follows the snickering, but usually the annoying girl always has to be better, and have the hitler mustach.... But to men it will always be a mystery behind what goes on in the women's room.It's weird I just came to realize the other day that men are not intelligent at all, okay... I'm with my friends I think it was on a monday, I only remember cause its the only day of the week I'm sober, okay anyway, my friends and I are talking, and all we were talking about was women, sex, places we had sex, what was the weirdest thing we did during sex, what people we had sex in front of, how many times we had sex with people we just met,and how many times we think about having sex with people who are married with kids... Well this went on for about 2 hours, and I am sitting there, and thinking "How are we still on this subject, there is a war going on in that place, and all we can talk about is sex, and I bet the soldiers on the front lines of war are talking about the same shit. as bombs and shit are flying over there head, "HEY BILL! DIDN'T THAT SPANISH CHICK GIVE YOU THE CLAP BACK HOME" and bill says "YEAH BUT IT WAS WORTH IT!" We as men were put on the earth to be unintelligent, and just talk about getting off, that is the only consumption I can come up with. Women on the other hand talk about Tiffany's for 2 hours and for guys that equals a quick game of russian roulette.I was reading cosmo in my bathroom the other day (hey I need reading material so shut it) And They say that women don't hit their sexual peak until 28-35, for males its like birth to about 25. But during the time of the male's peak, the women are like "Isn't that suppose to be in your pants???" We try and try, sometimes we succeed most of the times we don't. We get so frustrated with our ability to get laid. Trying and trying and no results, but the time you women turn 28 and hit your peak, guys are like "What the fuck I quit, so we pack up our balls and GO, move to vegas and get married to a prostitute named Yolanda ! Thats why the horney old stay at home moms bang the young spanish gardener......Thank you very much, Don't forget to tip your waitress!