chronically ill's blog: "2023"

Hello again. I know, it’s been awhile. I apologize. Yesterday, I was laying on the loveseat, when my phone went off I got the text I was waiting for. It was from my hand bell choir director. She said that bells start tonight, and what music to bring. I was so excited. It was a nice 3 month vacation, but I was so ready to go back. Matt had to drive me cause i had the shakes again. It’s been happening a lot for the past couple months. I have an appointment with a neurologist, but I can’t get in till December. Matt wasn’t happy that I have to wait till December. He made phone calls to other neurologists to get me in sooner, but, no luck. God, I haven’t driven my car in a long ass time. Matt is fine, and is recovering from surgery quite nicely. Take care

Yesterday i took Matt to the emergency room. He had a kidney stone that was 7mm. So they admitted him last night and did the surgery this afternoon. I’m tired and my butt hurts from sitting in the hospital chair for six hours. He’s home now and is laying in bed watching tv. I took the rest of the week off from work so I can take care of him. Good night

Went to church yesterday evening. I thought I was going to have an anxiety attack on the drive there. I kept wondering what would happen if I had an episode while driving. Those days are over and behind me. I don’t take that medicine anymore. It was nice being at church again, since I missed the last two weeks. I seen in the bulletin that handbell choir starts September 5th. I’m excited and ready. It was a nice vacation, but I’m ready to get back to it. I’m doing better health wise, still pretty tired. Especially in the morning. I go back to work tomorrow. I’m going stir crazy. Not much else has been going on.

Just wanted to let everyone know that I am doing much better. I actually drove my car to the grocery store yesterday. I was pretty nervous about driving. I’m thankful that I had so many people help me in my time of need. That was pretty scary. And just think, all from one pill. I’m just glad that’s over with, and I NEVER have to go through that again. I can’t wait to get back to work Monday. I’m going stir crazy.

Today was my first good day that I’ve had since I got very sick in two weeks. I actually did a little around the house while hubby slept. For some reason, I’ve slept better on the loveseat while I was sick. With my 24/7 Stephen king channel on of course. When hubby got up, he went to get my prednisone and then to jack in the box. I’ve hardly eaten while sick. I pigged the fuck out. I was soooo hungry. I just hope I can get to sleep tonight. I’ve always been a shitty sleeper. But, I do NOT want to be that sick again. That was scary. I’m definitely going to throw that prescription down the toilet. Bad thing is, we couldn’t figure out what was making me so sick in the first place. We were confused about the way I got so out of it like I did. Finally matt looked up my prescription and sure enough, it clicked right away. Didn’t do much, but it’s only day one

Yesterday I did a stupid thing. I drove my car to get a prescription filled. When I got luckily my next door neighbor came out to see if I was ok. I was so disoriented and confused. I couldn’t figure out how to get in. Then it happened. I lost my balance and fell off the front porch onto the driveway. I landed hard. My neighbor decided to call 911 to help get me inside. I was so panicky. I was afraid they were going to let me fall. So they got me into my house and everybody left. I don’t know how I managed to get on the floor, but I managed with a lot of time and effort to get back on the couch. I was freaking out really bad and kept grabbing the air. Hubby and I figured out what has been making me real sick. It’s my medicine I take at night to help me sleep. I won’t be taking that anymore. I’ve had a few problems today, but I slept it off. I’m so tired and drained. I’ll keep you updated ,

So, yesterday was a terrible day for me. My legs gave out on me. I collapsed and fell on the floor. I couldn’t get up or move my legs. I did manage to get up a couple times with a lot of effort. It didn’t last. I wound up collapsing and fell hard on the floor. I was on the floor for three hours. My bestie texted me. I told him what happened. He came over to help. When he saw how bad I was, he called Matt and told him how bad I was. So Jeff called 911. The ambulance came and took me to the emergency room. They ran a lot of tests. I was discharged around 10:30. I went To bed at 11. I dreamt I was in the hospital. Today I really struggled. I laid on the loveseat and took a nap. I have a doctors appointment today at 11:15. Matt is going to take me. I’m so tired and drained. I just want to go back to sleep. I wish I knew what keeps making me so sick. I’m tired of being so sick. It’s really done a number on me and my body. I just want to be normal again. Keep me in your prayers. Xoxo.

Sorry I haven’t posted in awhile. I’ve been having a lot of medical problems. It all started last month. I had to get my blood tested. My primary doctor called, and told me that my liver function is elevated, and I need to call my psychiatrist and have me removed from my medication that I take at night for my insomnia problem. He then put me on Ambian instead. I didn’t want to be on that, and I almost said something, but I didn’t. So I started the ambian, and my insomnia got worse. I would wake up four, sometimes five times through the night, every night. So basically, I was hardly getting any sleep whatsoever. After three weeks of taking it, my body and system totally shut down. I was in bed sleeping for three days straight. So I called my psychiatrist back and made an appointment for the next day. I told him I couldn’t take the ambian meds anymore, and that I needed something else. So he put me on a new antidepressant that helps with insomnia. The first day it worked pretty well, though I did wake up twice. It’s nice not having disturbing dreams anymore. Friday I was having trouble breathing. My chest felt really tight, it hurt to breathe, and my chest hurt. I messaged my pulmonary physician on the website, but he couldn’t get me till Monday afternoon. So Friday I went to the emergency room. I had to wait three hours in the waiting area before I got called back. At least they ran all the tests they needed while I waited. Then when I get a room, they gave me a breathing treatment, a shot of steroids in my iv. I didn’t feel that much better, and I told the nurse that, and he would tell the doctor. When the doctor finally came back, he acted like I wasn’t important enough and he rushed to have me discharged. He gave me a prescription for prednisone and an antibiotic. The antibiotic made me feel like shit. It gave me the jitters really bad. I also felt really weak and drained. I almost wrecked my car a couple times cause I was so jittery and shaky, that I had trouble stopping my car, especially at stop signs. I couldn’t get my car to stop until I was halfway through it already. Yesterday was one of my worst days ever. I was so confused and disoriented. Poor Matt was freaking out so bad. Anyhoo, today was my last dose of antibiotics and steroids. I am so happy to finished with that horrible antibiotic. That stuff fucked me up so bad. I took time off to recuperate. I used some of my vacation days, but I need to get rest and busy myself to get well again. Take care

Drove to the animal hospital in Glen Carbon to get Batman’s ashes. It was really hard. I sure do miss him. He was my baby baby boy. I got a card in the mail yesterday from the hospital, with a lot of signatures. Batman was a stray cat, from a friend. Batman is greatly and sorely missed. I’ve hardly ate in ten days, and lost seven pounds. Don’t worry guys, I do eat. Just once a day, and a very small meal. Trying to decide if I want to go to church tonight, or just stay home a lay down. I’ll probably go to church. I just wish I didn’t live so far from church. Have a good weekend

Took Batman to the vet tonight. He had a blockage that could come back even with surgery. I had no choice. I had to have him put to sleep. I’m so depressed. He was my baby baby boy. He was 10 years old now I’m down to three cats and a dog. Rest in peace Batman Callie.