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To an Old "Friend"

It is men like you who help give women hearts of stone.....I need you out of my system for now,so I shall type these words & hope for some sanity in venting...you may not read this for a while,but it will be here,waiting for you....by the time you read it...I WON'T!!!! Not for you...for ME!!!! You think you cannot love & your heart is made of stone you think you are so damn tough and love will never give you enough Then tell me...why did you run to me? when fate sent you to me after your last run subconsciously,you needed me there to feel my head upon your pounding chest when I told you it would be alright you knew it would be a horrible fight but now you have shut me out you think I will just disappear Is that why you always call late at night or is it just to hear that familiar voice when you hang up before I can answer I don't call back anymore Don't be afraid of love at all be afraid of ME I'll be right there,oh you know me The mysterious redhead in your dreams I'll haunt you like a ghost & I won't even really be there but you will know that you fucked up when you wake up knowing that I could have been lying there No more will I answer in your drunken calls No more will I let you know I care I'm the girl you made into an ice queen I'm the girl who was always fair.... I will always love you in some way But never will I go there again You should have just realized That I was the girl who would still be right there.... I don't care if this all rhymes...I just needed it off my chest...I have to get him out of my system & let my soul rest. Sometimes even fate cannot make people realize what is right in front of them.Everyone is not out to hurt someone. I could have made a difference in this man's life & he just wouldn't let his guard down,so I cannot waste another precious moment of my time waiting..... Good-Bye

R.I.P. PopPop

I just wanted to let everyone know that I recently lost PopPop...a man who has been so dear to me for so many years & I will be around here & there for the next little bit. I have to travel to Hazard & my boys have lots of ballgames,too,so time will limited. I miss eveyone here already,but Ihave lots of things I have to get right with me,too. The ex factor is just becoming ridiculous...I hate him more every day. Those of you who REALLY know me know that I do not throw the word hate at all!!!! I just want to protect my sons..that is all. Racing season is upon us now as well & this is just a crazy time of year for me. It won't be the same without you,Pops,but I know you will be watching over me!!!! LOVE YOU SOOOOO MUCH N MISS YOU ALREADY!!!
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