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Breathe child, you are free of hate.
And I envy you.
I want to bash you to sleep
And steal your peace.
For I am weak and there is no rest for the wicked.

As a child the life was bludgeoned from my being.
All that I have left is a shell.
Love me not, for I will destroy you.
I know this and I hold this fact dear.
I enjoy knowing I will be alone at the time of my demise.
Singing suicide hymns for no one to hear.
It’s alright now.

Basking in the glory of my defeat
Cause darling, it’s all that I have left now.
And secretly, subconsciously I think,
I wish for nothing more than to grab your hand
And pull you into the abyss with me.
And for you to fill this emptiness that is no longer a part of me.
It IS me.

I hope you can hear my screams now…
Because they are deafening.
This is for you.
My throat is raw and I’m begging for more.
There is no happy ending, and no savoir.
And this is alright with me.
I will float through life, with a smile, knowing that this is the longest chapter…
The last inning, and the final round.
And it will continue forever.  

I know that you’re watching me with paranoid eyes
Whispering into my ears those paranoid lies
Oh, you don’t have to… I know now that asphyxiation is beautiful
That I call you Nightmare but you are really my fantasy
The sun is bleeding red and lust can’t save me now

I wish that you could steal me away
And we could live like a fairy tale…
But hunny, fairy tales aren’t real.
Dreams come with cracks in them
And stars fall from the sky.
I have kissed the lips of hypocrisy
And held the hands of my mistakes…

I won’t miss you now.

++++

Do you hate me now?
The answer is in the question.
You always hated how I spoke in riddles
And I did it for that reason.

You're wishing for my death now I hear,
And I'm living just to spite you.
I lie about who I am now
So I can say I'm just like you.

I called you up the other day
I knew you would answer, you haven't changed.
It's kinda like a slap in the face knowing
I'm not the same.

Reality is like a head on collision
When karma comes back three fold.
Vengence is beautiful
And I'm thriving on the lies you told.

I'm just like you now
Gnawing on the hand that fed.
Slowly but surely
You'll choke on the words you've said.

the whole time you were talking I was too busy picturing you dead.

 

Scribble out all the false apologies
And mark this down as another casual tragedy.
The way I sobbed as you left me lying there
Trying and stifle your laughter as I struggled to keep with up time.
Pass me another dose- things are becoming clear.
The cliché cuts are much deeper than they need to be.
Much deeper then they would be if you ceased to breathe.
We’ll call this the only thing you ever did for me.
Close your eyes and remember me.
As the last thing you’ll ever see.


The sound is sickening
as they take my mistakes through their nose
in the next room.
The alcohol isn't working fast enough
and I still feel regret.
I remember faces
but not the names.
I never wanted it to get this bad.

When I was a child
I wanted to live forever.
Now with the sparkle gone from my eyes,
the glow gone from my skin.
I only want to die with
one single speck of honor.

The only light for me
is the sparkle in her eyes and the light around her halo.
Darkness comes from the life I lead...
The hate for Him
her parents were Jesus and Cesar.
She dies a little everyday…
No one believes her.
Romance with Razor Blades,
Everlasting Love and Narkanal.
See you on the other side.
Now we believe.
Take some Tylenol
Sit back and Breathe.
The pain they can not bear? I can.
Oh I will... I will be a revolution.


You make me so sick.
Like 7-up and crackers
Regurgitating my mistakes.
[Spelling them out like alphabet soup]

I’m crazy now
Voices in my mind and walls eating me alive.
Maniaphobia.
[Live in fear, live in fear]

The car is crashing.
Broken glass and shattering fiberglass.
Faces meeting the cracked cement.
[I'm not sorry I find this beautiful...]

I beg for another hit.
What do you have and how much should it take
To make me scratch a hole in my head?
[Filthee fucking addict]

We're killing it.
Blood bath and broken skulls.
Killing our creators.
[There's a new king now]

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