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getting old sucks.  In general I feel pretty good..but past year has really been getting to me.  I been starting to think, I am getting old.Looking at my boys now, seeing one about to graduate and other two years behind. Seeing them tower over me now.  Seeing my mom suffer from cancer for two years.  Even though she has passed away now at 63, it makes me feel old to see all this going on.Also feel like depression is starting to come on.I feel old and depressed and helpless at helping my dad.I know its gonna take time..that I cant make things better for him.Still bothers me though. I am trying to cope with all this myself.I have never been good at handling death.  I am the type who wants to just go off somewhere and be alone.  Not to have to deal with people.I cant do that now.  Dad has been wanting me around.Is it selfish of me to feel this way?Anyways.. if I dont say much to anyone on here..this is the reason.

no need to put insightful comments..just posting how I feel.

OnlineMonday Monday...so good to me :P
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