ok, so since i'm not at a level that i can make a mum (and why do i feel like i'm playing WoW again??) i'm just gonna do a blog about this.... feel free to comment whatever.
so i have this (now) ex that started as an online long distance thing. things didn't go so well, and i ended it. mainly, she says she was scared or whatever, but now, after i've moved on mentally, she wants to make a real attempt. i personally am over it, but she's bound and determined to "prove to you that i'm willing to make you my priority." well, this goes up to and including sex. i've told her more than once that if we hook up, it won't mean to me what it means to her. to me, it'll be sex. she seems convinced that it will bring me back to her. she has even hinted at bringing a friend along to join us. sounds good to me, but then i'm an OTR (over the road) driver and haven't had my ashes properly hauled in a couple months. but i KNOW that if she pushes the issue i'll cave and fuck her.
now, the question.... do i go ahead and plow the trollop, giving her an idea of just how much a cold blooded bastard i can be, treat it as i do almost any other sexual encounter, i.e. just a deeper sharing of myself with what i concider (and i do!) a friend, or man up, hit the cold shower and refuse her?
i know me. more over, i know what brain i think with and when. if she wants it, i'll most likely give it to her. i KNOW that is the wrong thing to do in this case and i've told her as much, but she's bound and determined we're gonna do the horizontal bop. almost assuredly if she gets her way it'll be an all weekend long thing. (i forgot to mention i'll be taking my home time in coffeyville next thursday thru monday. )
Jiitana, i already KNOW what you'll say, something to the effect of "come up here so we can fuck like beasts again." close?? i thought so. but i want opinions, (thought i'm TRYING to get a load up to ya Jiitana.... i REALLY am. i miss you!) no matter what they are.
so come one, come all..... what do ya think? the high road or the low road? i KNOW what i'm going to do if push comes to shove. i just want opinions.
