Maiden's blog: "Rip my clothes to rags"

I'm amazed at some of the things I tend undergo with on a daily basis and haven't gone on a murdering rampage or committed myself in a mental institution. For instance, today there was some homeless guy begging on the downtown "E" train going to Goodwood, and you can tell when people try to lie by saying, "I don't have any change", or make that patting of their pockets gesture, to say they don't have any fucking money or better yet, NOT give their money to this smelly vagrant. So while this pitiful human being walks pass everyone refusing him change so he can get his fix for the day, this lowlife asshole would seem to zoom in directly towards me with a determination that he's going to get some money out of me. Yeah, so I fucking gave in by sparing my precious pocket change, gum wrapper and lint and this crackhead, wonder boy who would go on saying, "God bless you daughter", like he's the fucking pope and walked into the next cart. Being so "generous" on my part, I make a mental note of my only good deed for the day to avoid having to go to Hell when I die. The very fucking moment "pee-pee stink boy" leaves, another homeless derelict is begging everyone for money. Feeling that I already did my good deed, I say to myself that this fucker ain't getting shit from me. I'm miserable enough traveling in a crowded train squashed between some fat woman eating "Cheetos" and some asshole playing "Reggae tone" on his fucking cellphone! As much as I wanted to yank his phone and shove it up his ass, I hope he realizes one day that they invented MP3 players and portable disc man's a long, ass time ago! So as this next homeless person walks towards my direction, the "cellphone D.J." hands the guy a dollar. The morbidly obese, cheese puff lady hands the guy cheese powder stained coins to this guy as well. When this bum looks to me to see if I was to also be ever so generous in this display of humanitarianism, I quickly ignored him by pretending I was asleep. Yes......I know.....how lame of me. I personally did not want to open my mouth and start spewing obscenities and sarcasm at this destitute dumbass, but I was fucking tired and pay day is Friday. Mummy needs a new pair of shoes and a stop at the beauty salon! After the homeless guy got the point and walked away, the "cellphone D.J." would tap my shoulder and say, " Yo girl, dat shit was fucked up, ya heard?". I replied, "The only thing I seem to be hearing is your FUCKING CELLPHONE, ya heard?". Of course this upsetted him in trying to match wits with me by saying, "Yo I ain't gotta hear this shit from you, whitey!" , as he puffs himself up and tries to act "hard". I simply looked at him, smiled and started blaring "Devil Driver" on my cell phone. Amazingly, nothing escalated as this doo-ragged, spanish, jackoff would only ask me, "Yo, where can I get ring tones THAT clear, mah dude?". Sigh....... I'm only another 20 mintues away from my destination and now another homeless person staggers in the train trying to make a pathetic attempt to sing, "New York, New York". Before I can make a chameleon of myself by pretending to be asleep again, "Cellphone D.J.", nudges me and says, "Yo pahtnah, yo dis crackhead bitch, is tweeking, niggah!". Stunned at how gold-toothed homey was raping the English language and even more at the fact that this guy has made a camaraderie towards me because he "respected my gangsta", another homeless guy would enter the other side of the train car and start cussing out this bitch for begging on his turf. Now you could feel the tension in the air and I knew the "Stay Puft, Cheese Puff Lady" was nervous because you can smell the strong scent of sweaty cheesiness reeking from her. I was entertained at how the homeless, crack headed woman was ranking at the guy for being an alcoholic and not trying to "hustle" to get his money. He in turn called her a "nasty, toothless bitch". As this war of degenerates was taking off nicely, an undercover cop flashed his badge and escorted the two sub-human scum out of the train on the next stop, berefting me of pure entertainment. So as "Cellphone D.J." was laughing like a hyena at the spectacle and "the human cheese puff" was still smelling of artificial cheese and funk, people start moving and crowding towards my side of the train car because someone started puking and seizuring in the train. Word gets to the conductor and this "geni-ass", ( I substituet the word 'genious' for people like this), stops the train halfway through the tunnel of the next trainstop. Smelling the nice mix of a possible drug induced vomit and cheese, we waited for 40 minutes smelling this shit until the EMT's came to haul the ass clown who was flopping like a fish away. I remember during that whole 40-minute-wait, evil thoughts and whines were flashing through my head. Stuff like possibly squeezing the guy through a window and tell the conductor to movet he fucking train or hoping this guy chokes on his vomit and dies for making me late! I know thinking like this is wrong by society's standards, but this shitbag couldn't have gotten sick on another, fucking train?!?!? FUCK! Plus from what I discovered, from a poll taken a few years ago, only 5% of the entire population in this country is considered "normal". Personally I'm scared to death of those people! These are one of many events I must seem to endure on an almost constant basis and it feels good to vent it out on a blog. I just hope one day I don't snap and have to come across another "cellphone D.J." and disembowel him with a fucking spork! Goodnight and goodluck folks! Ciao for now and please beat the shit out of someone crowding your personal space!

I HATE STUPID PEOPLE. Many may frown upon that sudden and maddening statement, but it's the damn truth. I don't know why, but I suppose since I have the uncanny habit of analyzing people's habits, speech patterns, etc., I've always found 1 fascinating part of human nature disgusting. Stupidity. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate people who have learning impediments, mental retardation, or other chronic mental states. It isn't their fault and I wish all the luck to them in their future. What really makes my blood boil to a near 212 degrees Farenheit are truly STUPID people. Let me explain. Emo kids who over-exaggerate their problems (problems that come along with adolescence) and claim that their life is a black void of nothingness simply to gain the apathy and sympathy of others are a prime example of people I like to identify as STUPID. People who blurt things out without measuring the consequences of their actions and with no regard to the feelings of others are STUPID. People who talk about something as if they know everything on the subject, when in reality then know nothing of the matter at hand are another prime example of STUPID people. People who have every opportunity to learn and to educate themselves about the hectic and ever changing world we live in yet choose not to and prefer to do other dumb ass shit (like drugs) are STUPID. Please bear with me and share your thoughts. This is just a small fraction of what I think and the people who I classify as lower-intelligence. I know this may seem a bit angry, but I've never actually talked to someone about this subject. It's so interesting yet so annoying. Only to be expected though, as in reality, humans are the only animals capable of hating each other.

I am the nightmare demon The deliverer of the dead I am the beast of rage The terror inside your head I am your phantom stalker Your shadow in the night I am your soul reaper The evil you can't fight I am your kidnapper The captor of your dreams I will be your torture The cause of all your screams When I hunt you down Your blood will stain my knife I will drag you into Hell And rip away your life!!

Nocturnal Pleasure marble cold and white, Monoliths arise, triving forever, towards the empty skies. I feel the shivers, through my spine, as out bodies unite, you now are mine...... limbs entwined, stone casket for a bed nocturnal pulse, making love among the dead, quickening pace, as extasy we reach, through the carnal gates we breach........I thrust forth, morbid lusts unfold, tween ancient graves, and headstones old. Exhausted gasping, we fall to the ground, the night is silent, not a single sound.........My lips touched yours, my neck you caressed, with the kiss of death. We lie there still, our powers return, soon again, the flame of lust will burn..........

Questions of a Cutter Razor blade, kitchen knife, Will You try to save me from this life? Broken glass, shaving blade, Is this the way I made my life? Aluminum can, razor wires, Is this my what my heart truley desires? Needles, safty pins, Shall I be punished for my degrading sins? Scissors, utility knife, Will all be answered with one last slice? Sharp metal, bits of tin, This last cut, shall be the end.

Lay down now and close your eyes As you think of broken butterflies That tore their wings upon a thorn Your mind is so very tired and worn Dream of blood trickling down And wake up just before you drown Dear sweet child, you'll cry no more tears As you bleed, it washes away your fears And as the moonlight shines down on you You'll have no doubt as to what to do But if you do happen to start to cry Then just whisper the cutter's lullaby Hushaby baby, you're almost dead You have no pulse and your pillow is red Noone loves you and the pain dissapates when you bleed Sleep tight with the knife, for it's all you need Rockaby baby, all broken and scarred You didn't know life was gonna be this hard Time to end the pain you hid so well And down will come baby, straight back to Hell.

Close your eyes...And go back... ....Before the Internet or PC or the MAC...... ....Before semi-automatics and crack.... ....Before Playstation, SEGA, Super Nintendo, even before Atari... ....Before cell phones, CD's, DVD's, voicemail and e-mail.... ....way back.... ....way.....way.....way back..... I'm talkin' Bout hide and seek at dusk Red light, Green light Red Rover....Red Rover..... Playing kickball & dodgeball until the first...no...second...no...third Streetlight came on Ring around the Rosie London Bridge Hot potato Hop Scotch Jump rope Duck....duck....GOOSE!!! YOU'RE IT!! Parents stood on the front porch and yelled (or whistled) for you to come home - no pagers or cell phones Mother May I? Hula Hoops Seeing shapes in the clouds Endless summer days and hot summer nights (no A/C) with the windows open The sound of crickets Running through the sprinkler Happy Meals Cereal Boxes with that GREAT prize in the bottom Cracker jacks with the same thing Ice pops with 2 sticks you could break and share with a friend ...but wait.....there's more.... Watchin' Saturday Morning cartoons Fat Albert, Road Runner, Picture Pages, G-Force & He-Man, Schoolhouse Rock Watchin' Sunday morning oldies (Abbott & Costello, Three Stooges) Wonder Woman & Super Man Underoos FONZIE...AYYYYYYYY Playing Dukes of Hazard Catchin' lightning bugs in a jar Christmas morning Your first day of school Bedtime Prayers and Goodnight Kisses Climbing trees Swinging as high as you could to try and reach the sky Getting an Ice Cream off the Good Humor Truck A million mosquito bites and sticky fingers Jumpin' down the steps Jumpin' on the bed Pillow fights Sleep-overs A 13" black and white TV in your room meant you were RICH Runnin' till you were out of breath Laughing so hard that your stomach hurt Being tired from PLAYING WORK: meant taking out the garbage or doing the dishes Your first crush Your first kiss (I mean the one that you kept your mouth CLOSED and your eyes OPEN Rainy days at school meant playing "Heads up 7UP" or hangman" in The classroom, Remember that? Oh, I'm not finished yet.... Kool-Aid was the drink of the summer So was a swig from the hose Giving your friends a ride on your handlebars Wearing your new shoes on the first day of school Class Field Trips with soggy sandwiches When nearly everyone's mom was at home when the kids got there When a quarter seemed like a fair allowance; And another quarter a MIRACLE When ANY parent could discipline ANY kid, or feed him, or use him to carry groceries...And nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it. When your parents took you to McDonalds and you were COOL When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to The fate that awaited you at home. Basically, we were in fear for our lives but it wasn't because of Drive by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat! And some of us are still afraid of em! Didn't that feel good? Just to go back and say, "Yeah, I remember That!" Well, let's keep going!! Let's go back to the time when... Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-MO" Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "do over!" "Race issues" meant arguing about who ran the fastest. Money issues were handled by whoever was the banker in "monopoly" Catching fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening It wasn't odd to have two or three "best" friends. Being old, referred to anyone over 20. (SHOOT! I'm officially old!) The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was cooties. Nobody was prettier than Mom Scrapes and bruises were kissed by mom or grandma and made better It was a big deal to finally be tall enough to ride the "big people" rides at the amusement park. Getting a foot of snow was a dream come true. Abilities were discovered because of a "double-dog-dare" Spinning around, getting dizzy and falling down was cause for giggles. The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team. Water balloons were the ultimate, ultimate weapon. Older siblings were your worst tormentors, but also your fiercest protector If you can remember most or all of these, then you have LIVED!!!

I've come across so many men on this site who say one thing and do another for example the one that comes to mind are the guys who say they will talk to you and never do, in fact they have no intention of ever talking with you , so my question is, why do you bullshit? I dont give a fuck, but what really gets to me are the guys who say they will and then dont,I hate liars and people with no integrity. What are you on here for? some as i have seen are just on here to show off their photos of themselves, theres two guys who have more pictures of themselves than I have ever seen on any sight.These guys are in love with themselves, they are real cam whores, winking and kissing their cams, as they click away to get the perfect shot so they can look at themselves, just pathetic, and you know who you are, you people are rude and not even worth knowing, take the make up off your face and your ugly, inside and out.

Your coffin is up on blocks. Your pick up truck is up on headstones. Your hearse has a shotgun rack Your wife-beater shirt is black. Your coon dogs are named Bela and Lestat. You have a pair of black latex overalls, with no crotch. You have hickeys with fang marks. You check the blood type of your victim with a dipstick. You don't have two front teeth, but you do have fangs. Your banjo is made of human bone. Your blood comes in a box You hold late night walks and poetry readings, in a junkyard. You think Johnny Cash has "pretty lips" Your coffin is lined with a velvet confederate flag Your hearse's horn plays the first few notes of Dixie, in D minor. Your hearse has Playboy mudflaps. You have a Moon tan line when wearing a short sleeve shirt. Your coffin liner is black and grey plaid. Your hearse is jacked up and sports deer lights. You smoke cloves in a corncob pipe. You dye your sheep black. You have elbow length black latex gloves, covered in pig shit. You midwived the cow your leather boots came from. That's engine grease on your face, not makeup. Your bull's nose is pierced 6 times. Even your teeth are black. Your hearse has its doors welded shut. You have a black velvet Elvis painting, postmortem. Your hearse has a trailer hitch. Your PVC/Fishnet shirt has your name on the pocket. You burn upside down crosses. You paint your pet gator black. It's easier to get a pet alligator than a rat. Your wife, mother, sister and dominatrix are all the same person. Fucking your sister involves digging her up first. Your beer cans have fang marks You get up at 4 AM every morning to collect eggs from the raven coop. Someone yells "Hoedown!" and your dominatrix hits the floor. You have an Elvira pinup in your outhouse. You claim that the bullet holes in your broken television set show your 'artistic side' and reflect your 'distaste for the media.' You love Skinny Puppy......with taters and gravy. Your top hat has a "John Deer" patch on the front. You have a red flannel trenchcoat. You brand your cattle with the Bauhaus logo. You buy your makeup from the hardware store. You make bondage jewelry out of old tires. Your face is paler than your hood. You have a bumper sticker on your pickup truck that says "The Dead Will Rise Again!" You have a giant pentagram belt buckle. Your coffin has a side-mounted spitoon. You have a flatbed hearse. Barbed wire is not only functional but a fashion statement for your house. You have spent your life perfecting black corn. You write depressing poetry about your "Achey Breaky Heart." Your closing remark at a funeral is "Y'all come back now, hear?"

This blog is for the person/persons who keep giving me a 1 rating, I'd like to say thank you very much,I'm very grateful. I'm not a super model nor do I claim to be, so it doesn't offened me if for some reason you want to give me a low rating, they all add up and the people who know me, know that ratings are of no interest or importance to me.So if you think your upsetting me your not, and i wont be losing any sleep over it. Oh God I'm such a liar,i just need a make over, I must be revolting and ugly, oh god!!! someone hates me,BOO HOO! oh god ,I'm so not happy, I'm going to drink myself to death and blame it on that mean person/s from cherrytap, for wrecking my life..........................puts fingers in throat and vomits