tHERE IS THIS KNOT I THE PIT OF MY STOMACH IN THE PIT OF ME LIES THE CENTER IM UNCENTERED IM LOST IN THOUGHT THOUGHTS OF HOW I DONT BELONG HERE OR NOW NOT SURE WHICH JUST SURE SOMETHING ISNT QUITE RIGHT ABOUT ME DAY TO DAY.WATCHING THE "NORMALCIES" OF LIFE AND OTHERS. Y DO THESE FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS SURFACE AND TWIST AROUND IN MY HEAD REALING ALL DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS PULLING ME APART AT THE SEEMS AND IT SEEMS THAT IT MUST ALL GO UNNOTICED TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD. IT SEEMS TO ME THAT IF I WAS IMPORTANT ENOUGH SOMEONE WOULD NOTICE THAT IM BLEEDING NEEDING A HAND UP OFF THE FLOOR UP OUT OF THIS RANCID POOL OF BLOODY THOUGHTS AND PUTRID FEELINGS. IF IDLE HANDS ARE THE DEVILS PLAYGROUND THEN IM A FUCKING SITTING DUCK! MY MIND RACES SO FAST SOMETIMES THAT I KNOW MY HANDS CANT KEEP UP BUT ITS QUITE APPARENT TO ME THAT NO MATTER HOW FAST MY MIND IS HE CAN STILL CATCH UP AND TAKE THE RIENS AND DRIVE ME INTO A PIT OF FLAMING SELF DESTRUCTION. INTERNAL PAIN NEEDS TO OUTSOURCED LIKE A FACTORY JOB TO A FOREINER. OH FUCK I HAVE STOPPED MAKING SENCE EVEN TO MYSELF. I CAN TASTE THE SALT IN THE WATER ON MY FACE ITS BURNING STREAKS OF FLESH FROM MY CHEEKS IT HURTS BUT ITS SUCH A RELIEF TO FEEL SOME OUTWARD SOMETHIN.............................ANYTHING.
