I'm a Seoul man Part 1
INTRODUCTORY NOTES
1. Yes, this first email is quite long...however you c@#ts best not complain. When I was in Australia you complained that I didn't write enough....the M'F'N grass is always greener.
2. Mom, apologies for any foul language...however, feel some solice in the fact that you are getting the unedited version and thus get complete honesty from me as to how much of a clown I am.
3. Dad, we can't call them Koala's in this country(although at this point I have not been to the zoo). What are we calling them this year????
4. Kyle, by the time you read this email I'm sure I will be back in Canada
5. Cecchin ... in answer to your last email...that gift came straight from my heart
6. Rips...I'll let you know in another month or so...but I think coming to visit me here may actually be a really fun trip for you
7. Berrafati...apologies for not meeting up while I was in Canada...hopefully by the time I get home Jen and you have a little bambino walking this earth
8. Checuti...sorry for not making it to boozefest...hopefully the Muse was amazing last Sunday
9. I think I am going to North Korea for Christmas...what Octoberist can ask for a better gift than that?
10. Gary, go fuck yourself.
I'm a Seoul man Part 1 - Korea has got Seoul
Well, as many of you are aware...I have recently moved to Seoul, Korea were I will be teaching English for the next year. I've been here for a few days now and I think I am going to like it just fine. But lets backtrack for a moment. The days leading up to Korea were quite hectic. Due to a long overdue trip to the modclub(thanks again Nina and Cheese for putting our drunken asses up in your place), Shizza(utin shle dutin and zigin ze nin en), last minute mp3 ripping, last minute visiting, a final round of solf, and other miscilanous tasks I essentially heading to the airport early Saturday morning without having much in the way of sleep over the past 72 hours. My family dropped me off at Pearson airport at 4:30 AM in preparation for my 6 AM flight. I said my goodbyes and was looking forward to boarding the plane to grab some shut eye. Obviously, as soon as you look forward to something there is a cog thrown in the wheel. My flight from Toronto to Chicago was delayed 4 hours which meant that I would also miss my subsequent connecting flight to San Francisco(from San Fran I was to fly directly into Seoul). In hindsight, this is probably a good thing as it is well documented how much gay guys(while I contest that I am universally loved you smucks won't accept that logic). San Francisco could have been tricky. Anyways...my trip was rerouted - Toronto-Chicago, Chicago-Tokyo, Tokyo-Seoul. I sent an email to my school's coordinator to let him know of my new arrival time. Now, apparently I can pass out ANYWHERE but on a plane. From TO-CHI, and CHI- TOYKO I didn't get much more than an hour of sleep.
Anyways...TOKYO!!! (Random thought #1 - All Japanese Males with the ability to grow facial hair look like samuri!!!). After about 15 minutes in Tokyo I found myself coming down with a fever. Now this was not no ordinary fever. It was a fever that paralysed Jeff for about 5 years of his life***...yes Yellow Fever. Japanese women are GORGEOUS!!!! Anyways, when I arrived in Japan I could not find my flight up on the boards. I proceded to the help desk where, to my pleasant surprise, I found out I had been upgraded to business class. About 20 minutes before boarding I noticed a guy who looked very familiar walk past me. After a moments reflection, I realized that he looked like Anthony Kiedis(lead singer of the Chilli Peppers). Five minutes later my suspicions were confirmed. I looked up to see a short guy with a shaved head walking with a massive, lifesized mirror. Upon closer inspection, I saw that it was not a mirror; it was Will Ferrell! Aparently the lack of sleep was getting to me at this point as it was the drummer from the Chilli Peppers, not Will Ferrell(Apologies for the inside joke to the 90% of you who have no clue what I'm talking about). Anyways, business class is posh. I essentially had a pseudo bed to myself and took full advantage by sleeping the whole 4 hour flight to Seoul.
SEOUL!!!!! So nothing like going through customs, grabbing your luggage, heading out of the airport, and realizing that there is NOBODY THERE to pick you up. Unbenounced to me, my school's coordinator was on vacation in China. This did not turn out to be as big of a hiccup as you may be predicting. I was fortunate enough to have my boss' phone number and was able to make arrangements to be picked up at the school and taken to my apartment. I was meet by Mr Tok... an incredibly nice local who works at the college. I think he apologized 87 times for not picking me up even though the circumstances were completely out of his hands. I was quite apprehensive on route to my apartment...I was expecting the worst. Luckily, my place is quite clean. Although it is quite square and there is not much imagination in terms of the archetecture of the room, it is clean and I have AC and heated floors. More so, looking at the apartments of the other teachers, I can definately make the place feel like home
Monday morning I meet some of the staff including two other new hires; Holly and Autumn. They are both from the NY area and are living affirmation that the big apple is the coolest city in the world. One is a pseudo hippi commi(Tan, you would become instant friends with her) and the other is an aspiring writer. Both are well educated have good musical taste buds(which is usually a rare virtue in most women I meet). Over the next two days we had orientation. On Wednesday we meet the rest of the staff. My first impressions of the group are very positive. Like most staff rooms there is a disproportional amount of estrogen in comparison to testosterone. The North American Staff consists of eight girls and two guys. One of the guys, Lance(the coordinator), is gay which again adds to the estrogen level. For the record, yes...I was recruited by a gay guy so laugh it up fuzzballs. Anyways, he is a really good guy. I think at some point this year I'm gonna pick his brain as to why guys love me(although my theory is still that I am universally loved). The other male on staff, Dave, is cool as a drinkable Colt 45. Him and his wife are the only other Canadians on staff. He is into sports, good Canadian music, Rum and Cokes, and ---AITKEN YOU ARE GONNA LOVE THIS--- He claims to be the BIGGEST Matt Good fan**** on the planet. Don't worry, I told him you invented Matt Good fans. Speaking of Rum and Coke(Mom, you may want to skip to the next paragraph or suffer from paranoia)...a 26 Ounce bottle costs 6 bucks in this country. TU ET MON GARCON BLU!!! You, more than anyone, know just how double edged that sword is.
As far as school...I have three groups of kids...Kindergarden, Elementary 1 and Elementary 2. I have not yet taught Kindergarden. My E1 class is at a very low level yet they are an energetic, enthusiastic and engaged bunch. My E2 class, on the other hand, are the polar opposite. They are quite advanced but are much more shy. That said, I think I am going to like my E2 class much more (Random thought #2 - Korean kids are much cuter than North American kids*****). My boss(Mr. Kim) is a very interesting man who has many stories to share in terms of life experiences. His wife is a beautiful human being. It is nice being at a school were the hardest workers are the owners. They are at the school for longer hours than the staff and work every Saturday as well. And yes Mom, I am already on route to establishing myself as the 'Golden Child' at the school.
One of the main critiques I have about Seoul at this point is that there are NO green spaces. I was quite worried after Day 1 that I would not find a soccer field. However, on day two I stumbled apon a gold mine! I found a small field with two nets. Actually, calling it a field is a bit deceptive. The 'field' is more like an open ground of pebbles, dirt and clay. Dad, I reckon it is much like many of the fields in Italy. I was still passionate about soccer in Australia but I found myself losing interest over my last few months in Canada. My interest has definately been rekindled in Korea and I think I am going to try and find a club team here. I have bought a replica of the 2006 World Cup Ball and have been at the 'field' everyday since I discovered it. I have already had some curious encounters at the park. First off, to paraphrase Micheal Cecchin, you can travel 9000 miles, cross the biggest body of water in the world, touch down in a country whose culture in many ways juxtaposes the culture you grew up in...and yet you cannot escape the question "What highschool did you go to". I had set an over-under of 7 days before I met someone from Hamilton. Well, not only was I under by 3 days, but I beat it twice in 60 seconds and even went to the same highschool at the same time as one of these people. I've also met some interesting Koreans including an old man who is a military supplier for South Korea(breathe Mom, breathe)!!! Also, I have established the 'Joe Palazzo Fan Club' which esentially consists of Korean kids who expect me to do tricks with the soccer ball on command.
Anyways... that is about it for now. I don't have a phone yet and will probably be without one for another few weeks. However, I am hooking up the internet tommorow so I will have a means of communicating. I love you all and hope that all is well back in Ontario(or wherever you are).
Your son, (or)your brother, (or) your friend, (or) your casual aquantance, (or) that guy whose email you are gonna delete without pause or thought
Joseph Kenneth Palazzo
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FOOTNOTES
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***Palazzo, Chaisson, Aitken, Fonseca . The New Yellow/Paybacks a Neice The Brown Cow EP, Hamilton, Ontario, 2006.
(Up your kilt boys, I am the lead singer and therefore my name goes first in all credits).
****Good, Matt. Empty Road Rock and Roll Review. Toronto, Canada, 2004. ----- my favorite song right now.
*****Don't you mofos take that out of context. I'm no Dusty Chase("The great thing about messing around with high school girls...you don't get fired, you get transfered")
