Buggzy A best friend is like a four leaf's blog: "Frustrated"

Have you ever wished, that when something or someone gets you either down or pissed off.

You could just shut off your feelings like a light switch?

Or when you have been with someone for so long, they just leave you at the curb, wondering what you did

You could wish, that you could forget them and all you shared, just so you could go on with your life.

Man I have always wished that for my self.  I wear my heart on my sleeve and most the time,  ohhhhhhhhhhhh helllllllllllllllllllllll all the time I get taken advantage of.

And un fortunetly , no one ever comes to my rescue to support me or tell me just to keep looking for the bigger picture.

That one day I will be rewarded for the kindness I have showen.

Man isnt that a pipe dream.

LOOKS FOR THE RAINBOW

Sitting in the shadow of my dark space.  No one may enter cause its my place.

Pondering why in Gods good name,  why am I hear, as tears run down my face hitting on my pillow case.

I wish I could just walk away,  never looking back,  I feel like just a sad sack.

Im nothing but a waste of time,  feeling like I am being punsished for some crime.

Everything is going wrong and nothing going right.  Im always fighting my head with my heart.  Both just tearring each other a part.

I want to break free of these shackles that bind me.  Please does any one have the key?

Release me from this bitter fate.  Let me just step out side once more.

Shutting this door of darkness that always seals my fate. 

I want to walk in the garden of roses,  and see my father who I was the closes.

You know if I had nuts right now,  they would be so far kicked up to my neck.

Times are hard for every one,  I can understand that fully.  But dammmmmmmmmmmmmit,  why is it just when things are slowly getting better meaning able to keep up with the bills and food and gas.

Boom I get kicked again,  and left crying.  My oldest boy was working and now he isnt and isnt sure when he will return to work.  Apparently there hasnt been much of jobs comming in for his company that he works for to do.

And when talking to my middle son who works at same place says he dont even know and his boss is clue less.  How can you be a boss and not  know when the contracts are gonna come in.

I fear my oldest is getting the shit end of the stick here and this is gonna cost us our home.  I am so lost and not sure which direction to go.

I need a mircle and fast!!!!!!!!