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Why me? That's all I ask.... It's one simple question. I love all that I can then get hurt everytime. I always give my all and I get my heart ripped out and stomped on. I kinda knew this was going to happen but I was hoping it wouldn't...it always does though. Maybe one day that person will realise how much I cared for them and how much I loved them cause they don't seem to notice now. This person made me a better person all around. I quit drinking and I was a happier person. I thought I found mr. right but I guess he did't feel the same about me. Even though he tells me he loves me and cares for me I had my doubts. Why would someone that loves you just give up on everything in a split second? I would give him the world, my heart, my all. I have tears of sadness and I wish they where tears of happiness but I guess my life is destine to never have tears of happiness. I always wish my heart would mend from things that happened in the past and right when it starts to heal the wound gets ripped wide open again. When will the pain stop? I personally don't think it ever will. I guess I'm going to go back to my old ways of drinking my problems away. It seemed to work and as I say...go with what works. I know it's not a good solution but it works for me so I'm off to get a bottle of captain morgan and drink till I can't feel the pain anymore. You will always be in my heart and I will always be here for you if you need me. I will always love you.....
For the ones who don't know Doug.... he is a guy I met off of fubar. He is a really sweet guy! He makes me the happiest that I'v been in a very long time. He is very special to me and I care about him deeply. I would never do him wrong or hurt him. He treat me like a princess and that has never happened to me before. Being with him makes me feel like a love struck teenager again. Examples: I cant wait to see him again right after he leaves. Everytime i get a text from him (no matter what it says) it makes me smile. I could sit on the phone with him forever and not say anything but be happy just cause i know he's there. He's my number one on here if ya didn't know. Thats not all just enough for now..... :)
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