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I have come to the conclusion that the year of 2006 is really a bad year for me and many that I love. Let me start off by tell you all that the year started off wonderful. I started a new job with Citi Financial and then my hubby and sister Hayley had their birthday together that I had made sure that the both of them enjoyed deeply. I spent over 3000 dollars to make this so. Then after the third month with Citi, the accounts that I had set up for my job ended up becoming another’s accounts. I quite my job to go and work for my hubby’s job that set me up with an Account Manager that was from Night mare on elm street, then as I took in a wonderful girl that was accused for something that she didn’t do. The triad that accused this innocent girl of something she didn’t do got her thrown in jail. From that point on, my whole entire life went upside down. My sister ended up moving with these guys to Washington and then she abandoned her daughter and two sons. Now take note, this is the same sister I supported for over a year and a half and also stuck by her side every day and night when she didn’t have money to feed her kids to when she didn’t have the rent to pay to live. Always, my friend was now in my trust from the God’s to help her. I did everything I could and I truly love her. Then I met my Cousin for the first time. Trust me that was a gift from GOD of GODDESS. During this time, I had managed to go threw four companies till my last job screwed me up the ass big time. They where not even approved to do loans in Nevada. Well let’s see…I love my job, my sister Hayley. Then I wrote a blog on how I wish my mother would be my mother and not my pastor, so now I have lost her. WOW…GOD is so great! Then my MOTHER who is such a wonderful Christain told my sister Vicky a lie that I said something bad about her husband and I was in deep shock. I would never say anything about her hubby. In fact I love her husband a lot. Well, because my mother got BUTT hurt, she went and told my little sister a lie and now we are not even talking. OK, let’s back up and re cap. I lost my job, my sister Hayley, my mother, my other sister Vicky. Now my husband company that he has been working with for over a year had just merged and they just told him as of the 13th that he is no longer working for the company because they don’t want to get approve in Nevada, WOW…can you say Hell is been set loose on my life. So, now my hubby and I out of work, we are living on our savings and we have a Condo that we are suppose to close on, but with neither of us working we had to change the program and now we have a higher rate and to top it a 1800 dollar Mortgage Payment. LOL… Then I get information from a inside person that Dividian is up to his own tricks and he is having spy’s asking to be added to my friends list, just to tell them that THE House of Ma’at is a bad House and that we are doing illegal stuff…WHAT? I am so beyond myself. I am alone in this hell we call earth…NO…there is no such thing as hell, we are already there. FUCK, if something doesn’t break soon I am going to be taking my ass to the Hospital and checking me in. NO one will see me nor talk to me again. I am so fucken tired of this un going drama in my life. Has someone put something on me? If so, why? I have done nothing but give…give…give…give…to everyone I know that is in need of a home, food, money or even if it is just a friend or a way of refuge and all I get is fuck you every day of my life. Trust me guys, there are days I just wish that I could go onto my next life and not look back. Please, if you care, love or you are my friend. I ask for your help. I ask of only one thing. Please lift me up and not say that you are and don’t do it. Please DO IT! I need help from all sides of energies. I can’t take this anymore. I think of death daily and I feel like I am in a whole with no way out. Please pray for me or lift me up. I try not to be negative, but there is a time in everyone’s life that we face weaknesses and it depends on how much of a support you get that helps you threw it. So please everyone I need you help….Please help me…I feel like I am dieing in side. Sincerely Countess Nessa
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