Joke of the dayWays To Turn Men DownHe: Can I buy you a drink?She: Actually, i'd rather have the moneyHe: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.She: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.He: Your face must turn a few heads.She: And your face must turn a few stomachs.He: Haven't I seen you some place before?She: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.He: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.She: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.He: How do you like your eggs in the morning?She: Unfertilized.He: I want to give myself to you.She: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.He: Didn't we go on a date once? or was it twice?She: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.
Joke of the dayThe Priest of a small village was very fond of his flock of ten hens and a cockerel.He kept them in a hen house behind the parish, but one Saturday night, the cockerel was missing.The priest, suspecting fowl play decided to say something about it at church the next morning.At Mass, he asked the congregation, has anyone got a cock? To which all the men stood up."No,no," he said, somewhat flustered,"that's not what I meant."Has anybody SEEN a cock?" All the women stood up."No, no," he said."Thats not what I meant either. Has anyone seen a cock that doesn't belong to them." Half the women stood up."No, no," He said, now thoroughly embarrassed"Perhaps I should rephrase the question: Has anybody here seen MY cock?" All the choirboys stood up.
Birt