1. If I speak to you, no matter how nicely it does not mean
   that I have the intention or desire to meet you, buy you  
   things or in general have any sort of connection to you.

2. You live near me, isn't that great/grand/wonderful. I 
   really don't care. I'm here to have a good time online
   (catch the keyword...online)

3. I am a sarcastic A-Hole/Bastard, get over it! If you 
   can't get over it, then please feel free to take a 
   long walk off of a short cliff.

4. No, I will not cyber with you. I am much to sarcastic
   a person to pull that off with any believability.

5. I look first and foremost for genuine people. Barring
   that I will try to find signs of intelligent life.