HEY SEXY....CAN I INVITE YOU OVER TO MY HOUSE.....SIT YOU DOWN ON MY COUCH....HAVE A LITTLE CONVO.....POUR SOME GREY GOOSE....AND TAKE YOU TO MY BEDROOM......LAY YOU DOWN ON MY BED.....AND TURN THE LIGHTS OFF ......LIGHT A FEW CANDLES.....TAKE OFF MY CLOTHES.......WALK TO THE DRESSER AND TURN ON SOME MUSIC.....THEN WALK SLOWLY BACK OVER TO THE BED......GET UNDER THE COVER.....AND ASK YOU TO DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO TO GET COMFORTABLE....I SLOWLY CLIMB ON TOP OF YOU AND BEGIN TO KISS YOUR STOMACH....AND WORK MY WAY DOWN.....AND FINALLY I GET ON MY KNEES AND START..... ...............PRAYING THAT YOU WILL BE BLESSED EVERYDAY!!..... GOTCHA ....I WONDER WHAT U WERE THINKING ABOUT WHEN U WERE READING THIS....SEND THIS 2 ALL THE SEXY PEOPLE U KNOW INCLUDING ME!!!! IF YOU THINK IM SEXY? IF YOU GET 5 BACK YOUR HOT! IF YOU GET 7 BACK YOUR CUTE IF YOU GET 10 BACK YOU FUCKEN ROCK

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If I could catch a rainbowI would do it just for youand share with you its beautyOn the days you're feeling blue.If I could build a mountainYou could call your very ownA place to find serenity,A place to be alone.If I could take your troublesI would toss them in the sea,But all these things I'm findingare impossible for me.I cannot build a mountainOr catch a rainbow fair,But let me be what I know best,A friend who's always there.This is a Hug Certificate!!Send One to All Your Friends Who You Think Deserve A Hug(Which Hopefully Includes the Person Who Sent It to You)

You have just been blown a kiss! You have been considered ONE of the"SWEETEST FRIENDS" on my friends list. Once you have been tagged, you have to tag your friends that you think are sweet (including the one who sent it to You) and let them know they are SWEET!!!if you recieve:-----------------1 - 3 ( ur sweet )4 - 6 ( ur cute )7 - 12 ( ur Efing H0T!!!!)

YOU WERE VOTED ONE OF THE SEXIEST PEOPLE ON FUBAR....WHEN YOU HAVE BEEN HIT, YOU MUST SENDTHIS PLAYBOY BUNNY TO ALL THE SEXY PEOPLE YOU KNOW INCLUDING THE PERSON THAT SEND IT TO YOU...___$$$$$$$___________$$$$$$$_____$$$$$$$$_______$$$$$$$$______$$$$$$$$$_____$$$$$$$________$$$$$$$$____$$$$$$$_________$$$$$$$$$__$$$$$$____________$$$$$$$$$$$$$_______________$$$$$$$$$__________$$$$$$$$$$$$$________$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$_______$$$___$$$$$$$$$$$$______$$$$$_$$$$$$$$$$$$$_____$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$______$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$_______$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$___________$$$$$$$$$$$$$__________$$$$$$$$$$$$$1-3-YOUR UGLY4-6-YOUR FINE6-8-YOUR HOTT8-10-YOU ARE Freakin SEXXXXXXYYYYYYY

"Hug Certificate for You!This poem is very sweet. It will be interesting to see who sends it back.Forward this on and back. Thanks!If I could catch a rainbowI would do it just for youAnd share with you its beautyOn the days you're feeling blue.If I could build a mountainYou could call your very own;A place to find serenity,A place to be aloneIf I could take your troublesI would toss them in the sea,But all these things I'm findingAre impossible for me.I cannot build a mountainOr catch a rainbow fair,But let me be what I know best,A friend who's always there

"HERE'S UR EARLY VALENTINE!!!!!!""THEY SAY IT TAKES A MINUTE.............TO FIND A SPECIAL PERSON, ............AN HOUR TO APPRECIATE THEM, ...............A DAY TO LOVE THEM, ..................AN ENTIRE LIFE TIME........... ................TO 4GET THEM....................SEND THIS TO THE PEOPLE...................U'LL NEVER 4GET.......................ITS A SHORT COMMENT.....................TO LET THEM KNOW...................THAT U'LL NEVER 4GET THEM.........IF U DON'T SEND THIS TO ANYONE..........IT MEAN UR'RE IN A HURRY.................AND THAT U 4GOTTEN........................UR FRIENDZIf you get a dozen your loved!!. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .*. . . . . . . . . . .*. . . . . . . ** *. . . . .. . . . . .*** . . * . . *****. . . . . . . . . . .** . . **. . . . .*. . . . . . . . . . ***.*. . *. . . . .*. . . . . . . . . .****. . . .** . . . ******. . . . . . . . . ***** . . . .**.*. . . . . **. . . . . . . . .*****. . . . . **. . . . . . *.**. . . . . . . .*****. . . . . .*. . . . . . *. . . . . . . .******. . . . .*. . . . . *. . . . . . . .******* . . .*. . . . .*. . . . . . . . .*********. . . . . *. . . . . . . . . .******* . **********. . . . . . . . .**.*******. . . . . . . . *. ******. . . . . . . . * *. .***. . *. . . . . . .**. . . . . . .*. . . . . *. . . . .****.*. . . .*. . . *******. .*. .*. . .*******. . . *.. . .*****. . . . *. . .**. . . . . .*. . .*. . . . . . **.*. . . . . . . . . **. . . . . . . . .*. . . . . . . . .*. . . . . . . . .*. . . . . . . . *. . . . . . . . *. . . . . . . . *. . . . . . . . *. . . . . . . . *send this rose to everyone you care about including me if u care!!!!"""

Send this back so I can think I'm pretty hahahaOK - I'VE BEEN HIT - NOW YOU HAVE BEEN HIT TOO SO YOU GOTTA PLAY!""""^^^^^^^^^^^^| || SEXY TRUCK | '|""";.., __.|_..._...______===|==|__|..., ] |"(@ )'(@ )""""*|(@ )(@ )*****(@YOU'VE BEEN HIT! YOU'VE BEEN CONSIDERED ONE OF THE SEXIEST ON MY LIST!ONCE YOU'VE BEEN HIT YOU HAVE TO HIT THE SEXIEST PEOPLE. IF YOU GET HITAGAIN YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE REALLY SEXY. IF YOU BREAK THE CHAIN YOU HAVEUGLINESS FOR 15 YEARS ..........SO HIT 15 SEXY PEOPLE AND LET THEM KNOWTHEY ARE SEXY...SEND THIS TO ALL THE PEOPLE THAT YOU THINK ARE SEXY...-IF YOU GOT 1 BACK THEN YOU ARE UGLY PEOPLE, JUST SENT YOU THIS TO BE NICE-IF YOU GOT 2 BACK YOU'RE BETTER THAN UGLY-IF YOU GET 3 BACK YOU'RE OKAY-IF YOU GET 4 BACK THEN YOU'RE PRETTY-IF YOU GET 5 BACK THEN YOU'RE FREAKIN SEXY-AND IF YOU GET MORE THAN THAT EVERYBODY THINKS YOU'RE #1 FINE

Mc Donalds Job ApplicationThis is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida...and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!NAME: Greg BulmashSEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.EDUCATION: Yes.LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.SALARY: Less than I'm worth.MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be"Do you have a car that runs?"HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.SIGN HERE: Aries.

YOU'RE IT!! YOU HAVE BEEN CONSIDERED ONE OF MY SWEETEST FRIENDS ON MY LIST ONCE YOU HAVE BEEN TAGGED YOU HAVE TO TAG 10 OF YOUR SWEETEST FRIENDS AND LET THEM KNOW THEY ARE SWEET X.X.X""FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore thisSend this heart 2 at least 15 ppl including me if u care 4 me!!!and if u get at least 10 back you will get good newz within 15 Min!!!Let's see how many hearts you get!!!!........¶¶¶¶¶¶............¶¶¶¶¶¶....¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶....¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶..¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶........¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶........¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶....¶¶¶¶¶ ¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ..¶¶¶¶¶¶¶. ¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶....¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶......¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ¶¶¶¶¶¶.........¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶...........¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶............¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶.............¶¶¶¶¶¶

This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it everyday. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.6. You mean the world to someone.7. You are special and unique.8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.10. When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.So..........If you are a loving friend, send this to everyone, including the one that sent it to you. If you get it back, then they really do love you.And always remember....when life hands you Lemons, ask for tequila and salt, and call me over!Good friends are like stars.......You don't always see them, but you know they are always there.'Whenever God Closes One Door He Always Opens Another, Even Though Sometimes It's Hell in the Hallway'I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here than a whole truck load when I'm gone.