Mother told me I have to marry an Indian.
To carry on the bloodline.
I sighed and stood in front of the silverware drawer.
I spent an hour holding a KFC spork,
Trying to figure out if it went with the forks or spoons.
Giving up was easy.

I use to idolize quitters.
They had the ability to just
Let. Things. Go.
I don’t remember how this started.
But I know this is where it ends.
Wave goodbye to lost loves and fits of lust.
If. I. Can.

Lets play Confession.
My name is Tarin and I have substance abuse problems.
I will do anything, so that I don’t feel empty.
I love someone but can't tell them.
Sobriety is my hell.
Sleeping alone makes me cry.
I am terrified to manatees.
I act childishly to avoid reality.

They say admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery.
I’m waiting.