You know you've watched too many zombie movies when...
by Zombie Chick & Demon Dave
Cemeteries just don't receive the same amount of respect from you as they used to.
You want to wear you body armor to work, but your boss won't let you.
You have counted the number of interior doors in your house vs. the number of windows.
You have memorized the shortest route to every gun store in town.
You have enough arms & ammo to supply a small country.
You have an 8' reinforced chain-link perimeter fence (topped with razor wire) installed around your cozy 3-bedroom suburban home. (Much to the displeasure of your neighbors.)
You try to scare your cat by shambling around with outstretched arms while groaning horribly.
The kids won't trick or treat at your house any more.
You never look at your local mall the same again.
You buy yourself a chainsaw - and you live in an apartment...
You get a job at the local mall just to learn where all the access tunnels are.
You can't store anything under your bed because of all the lumber.
All you ever want to be at Halloween is a zombie.
You start critiquing Tom Savini's makeup work.
You splurge and buy yourself a complete suit of Kevlar body armor. The whole time telling yourself "better safe than sorry".
Your little sister has been hospitalized three times for poisoning and you still haven't gotten the "zombie powder" recipe figured out.
You buy a lawn mower small enough that you can lift it easily.
You'll never eat custard pudding again.
You make a list entitled "You know you've watched too many zombie movies when..."
