ok so i wake up w/ something i can never have stuck in my head. so i downlaod it and listen to it & suprisingly didnt cry! some mornings i do that.but not today! ^_^
i feel free after telling a certain someone to get outa my arse! but now he wont stop texting me and calling me and hes all like im ready to get married now. i dont wasnt him to marry me outa guilt...HELL im not even to sure i still wanna be with him!!! >_< for one i fell out love & that wasnt my fault..absence made this heart grow forgetful not fonder.he wanted too m uch free time. always out at the bar drinking. but now hes kissing my ass. idk what to do about him. im going bonkerz!!! restraing orders are pretty harsh. grrr! any volunteers for an ass beating? get some sense knocked into his head! he keeps telling our friends hes scared hes gunna lose me...TOO LATE! he should have thought about me when i was wanting attention. i wasted 8 years on this guy all b/c he said we'd be together forever. dunno if ill ever believe that one again! i feel so jaded. my nerves are so bad my eys been twitching. plus i wake up & cry so much b4 i get outa bed some days. some days i wake up pukeing. im so insecure b/c of stupid shit. i shouldnt bring my self down but i find ways to pick my self up drurring those times.like today i rewarded my self with chinese food for not wakeing up and freaking out...i mean y not treat myself for good behavior lol (^o^)/ maybe ill get outa this silly vortex ive been sucked into! my ewating habboits have gotten better. i opted for a salad alot more often recentley since i was a kid.thou im DIEING for sushi!!! i need to call lisa and plan a sushi date soon. im feaning for some sticky ball!!! my friends that dont eat sushi are like what are those red things? i tell them salmon eggs. theyre all like eww! i thought so too till i tried it!!!
some people like to go threough life not knowing its good stuff! so as i sit here stuffing my face w/an egg roll i cant help but think i should be out doing something but there isnt shit to do. i hate it here! there arnt any good clubs anymore. they keep getting shut down. speakingof shutting down my eyeis twitching so imma take a break from my lover (computer).later bitches!!!