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CANDYSHOP's blog: "WTF!"

created on 08/02/2007  |  http://fubar.com/wtf/b110428

WTF????????????

I need to vent and I guess I am going to do it on FUBAR... Maybe I will feel better if I do.... What is the world coming to when you get so upset that you need the internet for advise? Where to begin..? When you lose your childhood and all your friends for the sake of "love" and then you relize that the only place you were really at was at a dead end... it sucks... Ya know, Daniel left for a married woman and got her pregnant. She is due in Dec and they are naming the baby Daniel Dewayne Chance Jr... Not to mention my youngest was born 8/22/03 (Johnathan Daniel) and he cheated and had Daniel Bailey 9/22/03.. Through that and a year in prison- I tried. When he nearly killed me and he overdosed on cocaine.. I tried... I can't try any more... Here is where the story gets fucked up... I knew Chris before Daniel- he had actually hooked us up... Chis's mom was married to Daniel's step grandfather... The first week of March Daniel did not come home.. The phone rang one day and it was Chris... Daniel had actually run off with Chris's girlfriend.. To try to shorten a long boring story I was going to let my house go and move to an apt. Chris talked me out of it.. Said that he needed to move in and help... Well he did and talked a good game.. This was fate etc etc.. For the first time in my life I was HAPPY... We did EVERYTHING together... dinner, movies, bowling, Gatlinburg, Daytona, painting the kids room, taking them to the park, cleaning, cooking, drinking, bars, clubs.... the list could go on forever...I felt special...I had so much fun.. I actually felt like a person and not just a mother.. That was the first time in years I had ever went anywhere... For the first time in almost 10 years I felt special and thought life couldnt get any better... but guess what Stephanie realized? After 4 months Chris did not have a job.. Stephanie was paying his probabation and all the fun we were having... but the promises kept pouring in... no results... I told him to leave on Fri- the same night he left to go to IL with a fucking whore he met on here.... Guess what he is doing a few days later? Living with her and he "loves" her... Will someone please tell me how in the hell I let this happen? How can someone make you fall so fucking hard that you foget all your priorties and they are about to forclose on your house becuase you had too much fun? Have can somone tell you they care when they don't? How can they bold face lie to you? Anyway, I feel used and lonely. I cant even go home becuase I can't stand being there. I gave him a car and let him talk me into getting a Lowes and Home Dept Card.. he helped max them out and took all that crap with him... Not to mention put 1500 on my Dell Card.... How can you go from being so happy to hurting so bad? How can you make the pain go away? When does the hurting stop? Why can one person never be enough for someone? Why is family not important? Why can you not love someone and come home to them every day... Eat supper together and ask them how their day went? What is wrong with this world or better yet someone please tell me why I am so fucked up? Why can't there be a light switch that you can turn off and on? Give a fuck, don't give a fuck.... FUCK YOU DANIEL! FUCK YOU CHRIS!
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