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The Toilet Seat Debate

Why women should leave the toilet seat up!

In the on going battle of toilet seat up or down I would like to submit the following in evidence toward the argument that women should leave the toilet seat up.

When using the toilet the average women have, at most, 7 movements required to use it. With seat down:

1. Lift dress/skirt/drop pants.

2. Drop panties

3. Sit down

3. Wipe

4. Stand up

5. Pull up panties

6. Pull up pants/drop dress/skirt

7. Flush

Now men, under the same conditions, have 12 movements to perform the same function.

1. Put up seat.

2. Unzip pants

3. Move shirt out of way

4. Open underwear

5. Dig it out

6. Aim

7. Shake it (believe it that it is a required movement)

8. Put it back in underwear

9. Zip up pants.

10. Tuck in shirt.

11. Flush

12. Put down toilet seat.

As you can see men are required to perform 5 more movements than women. It is easy to miss one or more of the required movements. That is why men are often seen with their zippers down or wet spots on their pants. SO, PLEASE LADIES GIVE US GUYS A BREAK IF WE FORGET TO PUT THE TOILET SEAT DOWN.

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New Grandson

My son called... I am a new grandpa. I have a grandson who carries the Iverson name. This is significant because he is the first for me. My current grandchildren are from children who I adopted. I will still love them all but this one is from my only son from me.

How rare is your name?


HowManyOfMe.com
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126
people with my name
in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?

Foster Daugher

I had a foster daughter named Melissa Hatten from 1987-1988. My wife and I were in the process of applying for adoption when she was pulled out of our home by a really screwed up California social worker. We think of her often and wonder how she is doing. She about 30 year old now. If any of you fubar's know her please let me know how she is.

sexual IQ

You have a Sexual IQ of 142
brain.jpg
When it comes to sex, you are a super genius. You have had a lot of experience, and sex interests you so you know a lot about it. You pride yourself on being a source of information and guidance to all of your friends.
'What is your Sexual IQ?' at QuizUniverse.com

closing my account

I am going to be closing my account. I can't keep up with it any longer. I can't tell who are friends and who are in it just for the ratings. I will miss many of you.

Pecans in the Cemetery

On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts. "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me," said one boy. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence. Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me." He just knew what it was. He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along. "Come here quick," said the boy, "you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls." The man said, "Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk." When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled slowly to the cemetery. Standing by the fence they heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me." The old man whispered, "Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord." Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord. At last they heard, "One for you, one for me. That's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done." They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the kid on the bike.

Jesus Arguments

My Cajun friend had 3 good arguments that Jesus was a Cajun: 1. He liked to serve fish to his friends. 2 He could make his own wine. 3. He wasn't afraid of water My Black friend had 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black: 1. He called everyone "brother." 2. He liked Gospel. 3. He couldn't get a fair trial. My Italian friend gave his 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian: 1. He talked with his hands. 2. He had wine with every meal. 3. He used olive oil. My California friend also had 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian: 1. He never cut his hair. 2. He walked around barefoot all the time 3. He started a new religion. My Irish friend then gave his 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish: 1. He never got married. 2. He was always telling stories. 3. He loved green pastures. But, my women friends have the most compelling evidence that Jesus was a woman: 1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food. 2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it. 3. And, even when he was dead, he had to get up because there was more work to do.

Another Veteran has died.

I got the news yesterday that SFC David Miller,US Army retired Vietnam vet, husband and father pasted away after a long bout with cancer caused by Agent Orange. Dave was my mentor in Vietnam. He is problably the reason I made it back alive. He taught me how to hit a target with a M60 machine gun from the door of a Huey helicopter doing about 60 knots. He taught me how to take care of my aircraft. He was a friend and fellow soldier. I had lost touch with him since Nam but had hoped to see him next year in Georgia at our reunion. I was told that the effects of the cancer took a toil on his body. I will always remember him as a vibrant young Sargeant, full of life. SFC Miller may be gone but not forgotten. Thomas J. Iverson, SSG US Army Retired
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