SPC Airborne's blog: "bar stories"

seeing as how i am bored with nothing better to do right now i figured i would write about one of my humorus nights out on the town.

It all started out with a girl, isn't that the way of things? I thought she was perfect, spent my time trying to figure out how i could get her to notice me as more than a friend. But for all the attempts i made to get her to go out with me the closest i came was her constantly trying to find me a girlfriend. This is the tale of what one of those attempts led to...

Gabrielle, the friend i had mentioned didn't notice my intrest, had arrainged for me to go out with one of her friends, Steph. We started off by going to a local coffee house that was having an open mic night. We spent a couple hours talking about different things, mainly music, books, and poetry. We liked alot of the same things, and lucky for me she liked my poetry. even got me to read her some on stage that night. I brought her home thinking things had gone well, and thought of where we could go for date 2. ended up deciding on radio taven, a bar that had live music, one of our mutual friends was playing a gig there the next saturday. as we were sitting in a booth right off stage and talking between songs i started to think i was in trouble. everytime a good looking girl would come over by our table steph would point her out with comments about her nice ass, or great set of tits. Now i was raised a gentleman and was trying to think of what i should say to this, after all you shouldn't be looking at other women when you are with a woman. And if you do look you should not be checking out their asses and tits if you want to survive the date your on. I covered by getting up and getting drinks often, the line at the bar bought me time to try and figure out where i was making my mistake. 

When i got back to the booth gabrielle and one of the groupies were sitting in the booth talking with steph about dancing. it was only a short time till they got me to admit i had never been dancing and didn't know how. and the next thing i know the groupie girl is saying it is easy all i have to do is stand there. and gabrielle and steph are both telling me to go dance with her. steph is actually pushing me out of the booth so i stand up and try to move a little. when the next thing i know groupie girl is running her hands down my arms and chest, grabbing my neck and climbing up on me like a pole. I just stand there with no idea what i should be doing as she wraps her legs around me and hangs on me. the only way to describe her dance was a pole dance with me as the pole...

After the song is over groupie girl goes to the bar and i sit down with steph preparing to get in trouble with my you told me to ready for my defense. i was not ready for her to ask me if that was fun. As i sit stunned trying to think what to say she gets me with her comment that it sure looked like fun. i spent the rest of the night in a daze, but on the way home she told me i was a great guy and she liked to hang out with me but she was a lesbian and all we could be was friends.

it took me awhile to absorb that, as i considered how bad of a date i must have been to turn her gay. but later that week she asked me to go hang out with her at the intersection a local club, one of her favorite artists was performing but she didn't want to go alone. so we met up and as we were driving to the club she asked me to be her date for the night, so she wouldn't have to deal with the creeps. From that night on she called me her "big scary white guy" we would hang out atleast once a week at bars clubs and coffee shops. She helped me learn to talk with girls and even tought me how to dance as more than a pole, and i scared away the creeps she didn't want to talk to. And everywhere we went she was checking out the girls telling me who i should go talk to, and on more than one occasion bringing them over to talk to me. 

So in short the best wingman i ever had, was a wingwoman and i can't think any guy would have been able to do better than she did.