Ok so my son is coming down to cali! i dont understand why i coulent keep him and why he has to be all the way out in another state??? WHY THE FUCK DID I GET PREGNANT BY AN COMPLEET LOOSER why didnt i get a career along time ago i could have kept him ??? why does my heart hirt?? why do i feel like a terrable mom when i suposenly did the best thing for my baby?? some day's i wonder why the fuck i did that shit to myself i mean i could have him here with me and i wouldent be so pissed at myself for fuckin up my heart like that and i would have what once made me feel so hole like my life was compleet and loved me regardless of what i look like or act like I just realy Miss him and LOVE HIM soooooo much! and wish there was a way to cure the pain of the broken heart that dwells inside of me!
thanks for reading...