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mscuddles's blog: "questions"

created on 10/11/2006  |  http://fubar.com/questions/b12653
Who Says We Have To Be A Certain Size? I get emails periodically from women who have read my blogs and tell me that I've helped them and I can't even express how happy that makes me. I received one today from a young woman who has been struggling with anorexia/bulemia. She's oh so nice and I wanted to further explain some things and i felt maybe i should do it in a blog....of course lol She mentioned how she'd always been told being overweight wasn't pretty and how it had caused her issues and such...you know..the same thing we've all heard all of our lives. We all grew up hearing this load of crap. It's nothing new...it's brainwashing really. It's curious as to how this started exactly when fat women used to be so celebrated in art, literature and the like. Also, women are SUPPOSED to be fat. It's just how our bodies are made. Women have more body fat than men..it's what helps us to sustain life and keep our bodies healthy. Of course, there's the argument when there's too much fat, but i've already given my thoughts on that subject as well and don't want to get into that here. My point is fat is not the enemy. It's curious where this all started. Some will tell you it's consumer driven being that the diet industry and physicians are raking in the cash and others will tell you that it really started in the 60's when the very thin body type became "in" so that women could remove their female traits in order to fit in with men in the cooporate world and a male dominated society. Others will tell you it's all about health purposes..but maybe it's not all that important to know where it started rather than who perpetuates it....other women. If you really think about it..who exactly has been telling you that fat is gross all your life? ..it's other women. Though there are men who do this as well, it is mostly other women enforcing this thought. When i changed my way of dressing at first i admit to having went over the top. I think after having been told what i couldn't wear for so many years ..and then finding freedom with it, i just went a little haywire lol. There were definitely things i wore out in public that nobody should've worn at all ...period lol Though, i think it was a good learning experience for me. I noticed that almost ALL the negative reactions i received were from other women. In fact, the positive reactions i received from men were shocking to me. Of course, i was dressed like a hootchie at times too though lol. ..but anyway, my point is..it was women who were gawking and giggling behind their hands and pointing...not the men. Most of my online criticism has come from women as well. A very large majority of it..except for the occasional little 13 year old boy which is to be expected. My response to them is "come back and talk to me when you're a full grown man and then we'll see if you're still making fun" lol ...and i guarantee you that a lot of them aren't. There are soooo many men that like large women that you'd really be shocked and then there are a lot of men who just aren't concerned with body size period. Though, a lot of them come under pressure too. They're *supposed* to have a girlfriend who looks like this or like that. But...if we'd just let the subject of fat die, we'd notice a total change in what men are bringin' home to mama. Ok...i'm getting off subject again lol. My point is that as women we're perpetuating an idea that is harmful to us. We're doing it to ourselves!! And why? because it's certainly not because of men..because i guarantee they like us better with some meat on our bones. So why do we keep doing this to ourselves is my question? Why do we keep trying to live up to an ideal body size that nobody can achieve and nobody is even sure of who came up with this ideal size or the reason behind it. Plus we're all different and it's impossible to have an ideal size for each individual person. By reinforcing this we've become sheep. I want to inspire women to break free and go against the grain and create a NEW standard. One that allows everyone to be comfortable at whatever size they wind up at. Our bodies naturally gravitate towards a certain size. BE that..don't go against it. ..become one with your body and know that it's OK to have some fat on ya..we're made that way for goodness sakes and stand up for yourselves ladies. Get angry when someone tries to force you to be something other than whatever it is that you are naturally. You'll find that they wind up feeling stupid for trying to fit you into some little box that you don't have to be in. Be strong and create your own world that makes YOU happy and you'll find that a lot more people than you ever realized will want to be included in that world. You'll become a leader and not a follower and you'll be a much happier person. Ok...there's my rant lol. I hope this helps some of you who have written and maybe others will stumble across it and help them as well :) Big FAT hugs
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