Where you’re standing…
I’ve been thinking about love and relationships and all that happy crappy stuff lately..don’t ask why, I must be off my meds lol. Anyways, here’s a little tidbit about that I’ve figured out. Ya know that first couple hours you spend with someone new? Be it at a bar, the movies..even just riding in a car? You know that tingle you get in your belly when you think that guy (or girl) is about to touch you for the first time? No I don’t mean groping or fondling or any of that good stuff lol. I mean them..laying their hand on your arm to make a point about something said. Or touching your hand..or your cheek or brushing your hair out of your face. You know, that first hesitant “should I touch her? Is it ok?” touch… I LOVE that feeling..that tingle, that anticipation…the butterflies. Does that feeling ever last longer than the first date? Is anyone out there with someone that can give them butterflies months or even years later? Does that stuff last that long? I mean seriously, because god could you imagine getting that ALL the time? That would be AMAZING! But people burn out on each other. They say they need their space, their time..but they’re really just getting burnt out on each other. They make excuses to not see each other. “I told the girls from work I’d stp out with them.” “I told Bob I’d help him roof his garage.” And they may not be lying, they may actually be out doing that stuff. But at the same time, they’re thinking, what am I going home to? Can I go home to him/her everyday for the rest of my life? Can I put up with this person, and all their flaws and foibles and basic generic bullshit day in and day out til God help me I finally bite the big one? Well…I dunno the answer to that one boys and girls. Hell I’m lucky if I can put up with someone for a freakin month. Most of y’all know the ins and outs of most of my relationships just from plundering through my endless long winded blogs. My relationships always always end for some reason or another. I’ve been cheated on, been used, been lied to, been tossed aside like last years shoes. But I’ve also been the one that pushed people away, wouldn’t take the time to learn, to compromise, to adapt. Know why? Cuz I’m a stubborn pig-headed bitch. Ya think you can change me? Good luck lmao, many have tried, many have failed. Many more will fail, because I don’t want to change..for the most part, I like the way I am. I’m not sorry I’m stubborn. It means I stand for what I believe, what I think is right, for me and my family. I am out for number one..and two and three lol My kids and I are my whole world. And if you can’t deal with that…umm..don’t let the door hit ya in the ass HAHAHAH..ok I know this isn’t where this blog was headed when I started writing it, but oh well lmao…
