GingerVonSleaze's blog: "When The Music Changes, So Does The Dance.."

have you ever wanted something so bad, that you just about gave up getting it? only because it seemed so impossible to reach out and claim it as your own.. but it's not as easy as you thought it would have been.

this ________ brings me sweet pain, but i want more...
because i know i will never have this same desire for someone else.

me and you feels so right,
but knowing i can't have you keeps me awake at night.
we get along just like a house on fire,
the spark was there and we clicked.

we had something special between you and me,
you entered my soul and set me free..
you have stolen my heart, even though we're apart.
why does it feel so good?


not having you here with me is tearing me up inside,
but i can't stop thinking about you no matter how hard i try.


i want this to be simple, i wish this all made sense,
waiting for a moment oh so intense.
to be held in your arms, to look into your eyes...
we're two in a million and one of a kind..


what im feeling i cant explain,
for in my heart you're in a frame..
and not being with you drives me insane.


i dont know what to do...
i wish i understood.

...boy meets girl, girl likes boy. boy is seemingly perfect.. boy likes the "idea" of a girl like girl.. & typically promises not to dip out on her, but when it comes down to it, boy cant handle it, girl's "too real" for him...
(get it?! yeahhh, me neither.)

...you'd think guys want girls who dont over dramatize things or girls that arent controlling, judgmental and are understanding and capable of handling their emotions other than negatively to anyone other then themselves..
(right?! ...no dude!!) 


it's obvious, some guys apparently like being reminded how much of a piece of shit they are on a daily basis, they need to be "mommied" or questioned everytime they do anything so much as take a shit in their own fucken house... what, are you fucken four? (still dont get it?! go figure.)


they apparently like being thrown the "pity card" frm their piece of shit ex girlfriends who cant even take care of themselves, let alone their own fucken children, yet have the audacity to dictate how and what theyre doing with their own fucken life, when its convenient for them!!! (that's right, feel bad for her, she's not getting what she wants, and godforbid he NOT CATER to her skank ass, happily & without her un-necessary fucken bullshit..) and apparently its fucken kosher to let their pill junkie fucken friends critize who theyre dating bc theyre asshurt that they never got to tap that too. so, like a good lap dog, theyre obedient and hide behind their goddamn skirt so their friends wont think any less of them... not that they ever did anyway..
(oh yeah, i went there!!)

so, basically what im getting at is this... someday you'll get tired of dealing with the bullshit and when you really need somebody the most, those people that you call "friends" arent gonna be there for you.. neither will your piece of shit ex girlfriends.. bc it wont be convenient for them.. where's your fucken backbone?! they made their sick bed, who else are they gonna ask to lay in it?! (theyre called "ex's" for a reason.) youre best to cut all ties and be done with them..


and for fucksake, dont "txt" your gf to tell her "youre done" at least give the girl a fucken reason, be honest about it and have the fucken balls to say it to her face, (EVERYTHING is 50/50. treat others how you expect to be treated, nothing more, nothing less..) dont just stop talking to her or "start your bullshit" with her bc its easier for you... (bc that's "cool", huh?!) it isnt like she ever did anything to you except EVERYTHING FOR YOU, to be deserving of something as shallow as that.



make a decission for yourself for a change, instead of letting other fucken people do it for you..  learn how to say no & wash your hands of the un-necessary bullshit, dont shut out the people who have always been there for you..


running frm your problems never solved anything, sooner or later they catch up to you.. (...just a thought.)

I've learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life. I've learned that it takes a long time to become the person I want to be. I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you ever see them. I've learned  that you can keep going long after you can't. I've learned that we are responsible for what we do,  no matter how we feel. I've learned that you either control our attitude or it controls you.  I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there better be something  else to take its place. I've learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences. I've learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score. I've learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time. I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when your down will be the ones that help you get back up. I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry, I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. I've learned that true friendship continues to grow even over the longest of distances. Same goes for TRUE LOVE!! I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesnt mean they dont love you with all they have. I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you once in a while and you must forgive them for that. I've learned that sometimes it isn't enough to be forgiven by others, SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO FORGIVE YOURSELF. I've learned that no matter how much your heart is broken, the world does NOT stop for your grief. I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become. I've learned that just because two people argue doesnt mean they dont love each other, and just because they dont argue doesnt mean they do love each other. I've learned that we dont have to change friends if we understand that friends change. I've learned that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever. I've learned that two people can look at exactly the same thing and see something totally different. I've learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who dont even know you. I've learned that even when you think you have nothing more to give,-if a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help. I've learned that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being. I've learned that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.