GamerGirl's blog: "whats on my mind "

so im sitting here about to brake down in to tears and i have no clue why it sucks ass there has been so much to go on in my life the past 5 months and i guess i have finely hit my braking point. 

i mean i lost my grandmother almost 5 months ago to cancer her hole body was ate up with it and 2 weeks after i lost her my bf (of over a year) cheats on my with someone 20 years older them him and my self esteem was at an all time new low for me i feels like i was nothing that i was not good enough for anyone i pushed almost everyone i loved or cared about out of my life and would not let them in i feel so unwanted by my family anymore its like they only want me around for my money or what not my mom never calls to see how i feel or shit like that idk maybe its just me but if i was to leave here they would not care i sometimes think they would be happier with me not around i wish i did not feel like this 

yes in the past i have tryed to kill myself but never could somethis always saved me and after lossing my grandmother i tryed again i tryed to OD i did not want to be with out her anymore i felt like i could not face this would with out her she was my best friend my rock yes i was a grandmas girl all the way 

--LOVE--

ME

So Far Away - Avenged Sevenfold