I'm beginning to think that if I left today,my blood relatives wouldn't even realize that I was gone. Would they miss me if I was dead? Right now, all I want to do, is crawl under a rock and die. Sorry for the dark cloud - but my blood relatives have me in a horrible mood.

So my family seems to think it is my fault for my brothers depression and the fact that he is bi-polar. "what did you do to piss him off this time kathy?" "why can't you keep your stupid mouth shut kathy?" "you need to watch what you say to him kathy" please someone tell me, why the hell is everything my damn fault??? we couldn't even mourn at my aunt jean's funeral..why??...because apparently i said something to upset my brother. this whole thing is just making me sick...i sprained my wrist hitting a brick wall today.... so yeah .. just blame me if something isn't quite right... its generally my damn fault. bratty bytch/out!