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Im feeling unusualy deep tonight, staring out at the night sky and just thinking over everything that has happened through my life to put me where I am right now and it just suddenly hit me like a freight train that my whole life I've thought I've been miserable, but looking back on it, every moment of my life thats affected me I have a deep well of pride for having gone through it because it's made me into the person I am today. Every broken heart or sundered relationship, every painful act and wrong decision has shaped and molded my character into the person that I am today, one of honor, integrity, pride, and self-power. And yet, having looked back with the gift of hindsight I can't help but wonder....would I make those decisions again if I TRULY was given the oppurtunity to change my own future and I can't say with 100% certainty that I would. Maybe I'd have kept myself in better shape than I am now. Maybe I'd have stayed in highschool instead of dropping out in the 10th grade and going to Job Corps. Maybe I wouldn't have gotten myself arrested and imprisoned. Who truly knows but this has given me something to dream on....
