I get so many questions so I thought I would start a blog...feel free to add you swinging experiences to the comments. So here is the answer to the most common question:
What is a Swinger?
Swinging activities can include (but are not limited to):
Exhibitionism: having sex with a partner while being watched.
Voyeurism: watching others have sex (perhaps with the above mentioned partner).
Soft Swinging or Soft Swap: kissing, stroking, or having oral sex with a third or fourth person. This may be in the form of a threesome or group sex, or partners may literally be swapped.
Full Swap: having penetrative sex with someone other than one's partner, which is the commonly understood definition of swinging (though not necessarily the most common type).
Group Sex: An all inclusive term for activities involving multiple partners in the same vicinity.
Typically, swinging activities occur when a married or otherwise committed couple engages with either another couple, multiple couples, or a single individual. These acts can occur in the same room (often called same room swinging) though different or separate room swinging does occur. Sex on these occasions is often referred to as play.
While the vast majority of swingers are heterosexual couples, a major part of Lifestyle activities are bisexual in nature. A large portion of female swingers, while they may or may not identify as bisexual, are interested in female-female sexual contact. Male-male contact is very rare, and usually frowned upon at a Swing Club/Party.
Female bisexuality and bicurious is extremely common in both the urban and traditional swinging scene and tends to be the norm amongst participants. No studies have been conducted as to what percentage of swinging women who define themselves as bisexual would be open to romantic as well as sexual relations with both genders.
Male bisexuality is less common in the swinging scene, but is becoming more common and more accepted. More openly bi men and bisexual couples (male-female couples where both partners are bisexual) are appearing on the scene. Whether this is due to increasing acceptance in the scene or greater numbers of men "turning bi" is open to discussion. Depending on the club or social situation, male bisexuality among swingers may either be frowned upon, or openly accepted.
The acceptance of singles at swinging events varies from geographic area to geographic area. Some swinging 'clubs' have a policy of allowing only couples and females, but most do allow single men on selected nights. Single females are often admitted at reduced admission price. Parties and private events may differ, however, and are often restricted to couples or couples and single females only.
The reasons for this vary. Most (but certainly not all) of the people who pay to participate in swinger events are male-female couples and most swinging couples are more interested in interacting with other couples or with single women than with single men. Thus, swinger events strive to achieve a balance between male and female participants or have a (usually slightly) larger number of females than males.
A common complaint among swingers is that single men change the tone and nature of event. While outright hostility towards single men is rarely prevalent, an abundance of single males is rarely looked upon favourably in any swinging context. When single males are permitted their numbers are usually limited by high entrance fees or stringent membership requirements.
Some swingers oppose the involvement of any singles of either sex in swinging because of the fear that they might split existing couples. While this might be a fear of some new couples, couples who have been part of the "Lifestyle" for some time report that the only way a couple can "split" is when one of the couple is looking outside the primary relationship. This is not the norm in a swinger relationship.
