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i come home everynight after working to find a cold house! i have 2 wonderfull kids that i would love to be around but it isnt possible! i have a hart that just gets fuked over everytime i throw it out there! so i sit and drink! i want soo much more out of life but the onley thing that seems worth it to me is happiness! and what is happiness? money?.....no! power?........HELL NO! to me happines would be being in love and with someone that is willing to do as much 4 me as i would for them! to love,trust,help, and grow with me except my faults as i would theirs, and just grow as one! my whole life i havent done much to improve my financial well being, or to really do much of anything besides try to find true peace! well ive found peace within my self! i just havent found the other half of me to complete it! now as i grow older im finding myself slowly growing tired of searching. tired of being "the nice guy" tired of being what i always have found true of what makes me me! but im not quiting yet! one day i will find that perfect balance! one day i will find my other half! my kids mean soo much to me but they cant be here enough to fill the emptyness! my friends mean alot but not enough to make me truelly happy! all i have is my faith! my faih that it will get better! my faith that im destin to be alone my faith that i will find that perfect person were i can come in and make them feel like all the pieces finally feel into place! but with each day, with each week, with each year it is slowly chipped away! but as cheesie as it sounds my faith " which is all anyone truely has"! is becomeing finshed and what will be in the end will be unique and onley mine! but i hope i find what i have always searched for! my own love!
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