Jersey Boy's blog: "Love and Forgiveness"

For Two People destined to be... Forgiveness changes us physically, emotionally and spiritually. It dissolves the weight of resentment and floods us with fresh new energy. It mends our tattered personal boundaries and empowers us to move forward with hope and inspiration in contrast to the traumatic experiences of holding a grudge. When we release this trauma, we rekindle a connection with our spiritual sense. That sense offers us new light and we find ourselves on new ground with another. When we're in great pain we're not very inclined to forgive, we just want to feel better. It’s kind of like having a toothache and recognizing the need for dental work. You don’t want to go to the dentist and feel more pain for an hour, so you stay in denial for a while. But the pain persists and you know that you’ll feel better if you do something about it. So you muster the discipline to make that appointment, go through the experience and get rid of the root problem. Perhaps, we find ourselves put off on the idea of the actual need to forgive, because THEN we have to actually do something about it! Forgiveness is hard...naturally we don’t know how because it's not part of the survival agenda that human beings instinctively possess. Perhaps we're afraid that if we forgive someone who has hurt us, we'll make ourselves too vulnerable and leave ourselves wide open for further hurt. Perhaps we can’t forgive because we feel that what was done is unjust, and we think that forgiveness implies that we condone injustice... (Good News - It doesn’t.) Perhaps, we find so much satisfaction in feeling " right" in our judgement of another, that we’d rather be right than be at peace. WHY WE FORGIVE THOSE WE LOVE ? At the end of the day, people are ready to forgive when they tire of the struggle and hurt within that weighs heavily on their heart and soul. It's at that very moment in time that we're in touch with our spirtual selves and when peace of mind and soul outweighs the need to be right. Peace and Love