I shouldn't be this depressed...
I have the world, and regularly give it away.
I want to be someone else sometimes.
I want to believe, but the rational side of me can't.
I shouldn't be this worried about my family.
I shouldn't be this crippled with sorrow.
Where is the other side?
Where is the salvation?
Where is the solice from soul-starvation?
Where is that feeling of contentment...
in this empty shell.
I shouldn't... but I feel so far from humanity.
Outsiders. Fragile... beautifully flawed strangers.
Wholey different from myself.
Perfectly imperfect.
I wish one would touch me.
But if I am not humanity.. then who am I?
What am I?
What have I?
Who am I?
...someone please... reach me.
Identify me.
Define me.
Explain me.
As something other than different..unfamiliar... outsider.
It's so unkind.
It's so unbearable.
To be this far out of reach.
Lonliness.
With emptiness.
Concern.
With confusion.
Doubt.
With faith.
What do I believe...
What can I accept?
What do I want?
...Where are you?
Where is everyone that promised to keep me from myself?
...can anyone really?
Can anyone really keep my darkness in check?
My angry, hurt, blind, raging hollow.
The presence... that reminds me constantly...
of my nothing.
Find me.
Fix me.
Fuck me.
Fill me.
Feel me.
Fail me.
Follow me.
Fight me.
Forget me.
