And so i went over to steve's last night to hear what he had to say .. he said that he miss me and wanted to try and work things out. I told him that i didn't like being treated like shit and that i was through with begging him to stay with me. If he wanted to be with me, he was gonna have to make a change and start treating me the way i deserve to be treated. I barely said anythin to him.. Just sat and listened. I'm basically through with all the bullshit... and am lookin for somethin real. If he can't give me that then I'm done. NO MORE GAMES.
Look, I love him with all of my heart and I'm not sure what to do about the situation. To be honest, I don't know why I love him so much because of the way i have been treated by him. I guess I just try to overlook the bad qualities in a person and see their good... which can be a bad thing because your brain just doesn't wanna work with your heart.
I'm not sure what i'm gonna do. I'm not sure i even wanna be with him after all the hurt i have been put through. I went to his house thinking i was gonna get him back.. and i sure enough did. But now I'm not sure i want that. I think what i need to do is just take some time to myself to think.
I have been talkin to some pretty awesome people and they have helped me see some things that i may have needed help pointing out. You know who you are and you are freakin awesome! Just I'm really starting to think I'm better than all that and i dunno what i would do without you guys here to help me.
Look, I'm not gonna go beggin him.. not gonna go chasing him like i did. If he truly wants to be with me, then he will chase me. He will make the effort to see me and to be with me. Otherwise, I'm completely done.
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Please comment me on this blog and let me know what i should do. I really do need some advice esp you guys out there... what should i do?