The Vampire Lestat's blog: "Various stuff."

Everyone always expects the most out of me. Family, friends all push me to be superman. I know it's not an on purpose thing. It's just trying to make me better. But, even as great as maybe I can be, I can only do so much. Sometimes it's just overwhelming. Expecially when I demand so much from myself anyways. One of my lines has always been. "Everyone calls on a hero to be saved. But, what happens when the hero needs saving?" I'm not asking to be saved. Just give this superman a holiday.

I just thought of a few little stupid annoying things. Some might take offense but hey can't please everyone. It's only 3 so chill. #3 huh? what? I don't know? all used in one line (that's just plain annoying. say one not all 3 at once.) #2 I bite... not hard though tee hee... (ok where to begin with this? is it suppose to be cute? Not sure you're just making a fool out of yourself.) and the most irritating thing #1 Guns go bang! (no shit?! next you'll be saying dogs go woof or cows go moo how retarded do you have to be to say guns go bang? seriously)

So I was at work as usual. Had a meeting today and relay for life came up. I'm always a big sponsor of relay for life. Yeah I guess there is a heart in there some where lol. Anyways for a buck a paper star gets put up and it goes to charity for cure for cancer organization. I feel a bit accomplished. I mean it was only a buck that's not much and those bucks add up. I had a couple laying around in my locker. Might as well give it to a better cause then a bag of chips or a soda. Thinking I might get another one. Now if you're feeling generous or in the caring mood. You can drop a buck in a paypal account I have and i'll buy stars with your name on them. Or if you're not a fan of relay for life i'm more than happy to donate it to the red cross. If you weren't aware March is red cross month. Around here you can buy things like stars and ribbons to donate at gas stations. But, if you're one of the people who can't find a worthy cause to donate to i'll help you out. Leave a comment under this blog if you're interested. Or just in general. -CJ

It makes me sick to my stomach to think that there are people cheating on someone. How can someone do that? I feel bad knowing that there's girls and guys out there that are going through what i've gone through. You can't love someone if you can't be faithful to them. Love isn't about good times all the time. So many toss the word LOVE around alot. Without stopping to think of the meaning behind it. So many use someone for sex. Love isn't about sex. Those people ever stop to think about am i ready for a child? doubtful how about years down the road. when they get old and that lustful attraction that they call "love" goes away. I feel bad for the girls and guys that pour their everything into the ones that care nothing for love. Hopefully those same people who get hurt like that won't give up a chance to a person who will appreciate what love truly is. and hopefully those people who can do that to someone can get a taste of karma for themselves.

Bar Owners- It must suck to be a bar owner. Just think about it. Wife/girlfriend messes around on you/leaves you etc. best friend/sibling/parent dies whatever the case may be. And you have a whole bar stocked with who knows how much liquor. It's like giving a key to the candystore to a little kid. I'm surprised there isn't more bar owner drinking deaths.

Time has had it's way with me. My broken tired hands cant build a thing. The wires that have held me still embedded now in flesh to find my will. The idle of my days is won, the empty I have fed has made me numb, Despite what you will find in me. The failures of my past just swirl beneath. [Pre-chorus] I need a heart that carries on through the pain When the walls start collapsing again. Give me a soul that never ceases to follow, Despite the infection within [Chorus] Our careless feet leaving trails Neverminding the fragile dirt we all end in. Our careless feet leaving trails Neverminding the fragile dirt we all end in. This is where I find my fall the cares that held me alive dont work at all. And every step away from here is closer to the plague I hold so dear. I need a heart that carries on through the pain, When the walls start collapsing again. Give me a soul that never ceases to follow despite the infection within Awaiting my end breathing in the day that finds me new. Redemption begins bleeding out the flaws in place of you. Awaiting my end breathing in the day that finds me new. Redemption begins Redemption Begins. [Chorus]

don't look, don't look the shadows breathe whispering me away from you don't wake at night to watch her sleep you know that you will always see this trembling, adored, toussled bird-mad girl every night i burn every night i call your name every night i burn every night i fall again don't talk of love 'cause shadows blur murmuring me away from you don't talk of worlds that never were the end is always ever true there's nothing you can ever say nothing you can ever do still every night i burn every night i scream your name every night i burn every night the dream's the same every night i burn waiting for my only friend every night i burn waiting for the world to end just paint your face and shadow smile slipping me away from you oh it doesn't matter how you hide find you if we're wanting to so slide back down and close your eyes sleep awhile - you must be tired when every night i burn every night i call your name every night i burn every night i fall again every night i burn scream the animal screams every night i burn dream the crow black dream dream the crow black dream Still every night I burn, every night I scream your name. Every night I burn, Every night the dream's the same. Every night I burn, screaming the animal scream Every night I burn, dreaming the crow-black dream. yeah, yeah Dreaming the crow-black dream...