I'm always all, "Yay! Two new emails!" But then, I'm all, "Aw. I don't want to enlarge my penis!" Spam is a bitch...

Preparing to watch the new episode of South Park that I missed last night. It had better be epic!

Why, hello, Fubar! It's been a while!

;D

Preparing to fail a math exam. I'm sure spending the next hour on here will help me reach that goal! :D

:D

I feel like a health nut right now. Half an hour of yoga followed by a lunch of carrots, pineapple, and celery and peanut butter. Note to self: Eat cake later. LOTS OF CAKE. This is just wrong.

When you accidentally type a winky face instead of a smiley, shit gets awkward...

FYI, when everyone has unlimited 11's and you still rate my profile a 10, I know you're a dick. :)

I was just called a "sexy little goth girl." My day has officially been made.

Got all naked for my boyfriend, then he left...At least the two occurrences aren't related. XD

Mmmkay. I've blocked you three times; you've made three extra profiles to keep talking to me. Ever heard of the word "harassment," dude? 'Cause you seem to be a pro at it!

Sometimes, I wish the drinks on here were real. Getting shit-faced for real would be way more fun! :p

Wow. I haven't been on here in forever... o.O

One day, I'm going to hire someone to take my pants off when I'm too lazy to do it myself...

When somebody pees on the table, you know you've had an epic night. :p

A cancer patient only has one wish, to get better. I know 97% of you won't post this as your status, but my friends will be that 3% that do. In honor of someone who died, or is fighting or has fought cancer.

I think I need some form of psychiatric help. Dreaming about Spongebob is NOT normal...

Ah, what a lovely Tuesday this is! My English class has been cancelled, and I will now sleep like no one has ever slept before! :D

If I don't have 11's, I won't rate, so don't be offended if I don't rate you back. Lowering people's overall ratings for a tiny amount of points just isn't something I like doing...