The brief moments when I don't know whether the bug is on the inside or outside of my car window are easily the most traumatic moments of my day.

Who decided that paper beats rock? Let's test this theory. Have someone hold up a sheet of paper in front of his or her face, then throw a rock at it. Who wins?

Who invented hugs? I mean, the first hug would have been so awkward. "What are you doing, why are you holding me?!.." "Shhh just trust me"

We debated for years what the participation trophy generation would turn out to be. Now we know

when people say anything is possible, I think about trying to staple pudding to a tree

female. fe= iron. male= man. I am iron man

Has anyone ever noticed that it's impossible to make pinching your elbow hurt?

I think it's cool how the word OK is a sideways person.

adulting is not all it's cracked up to be...

alrighty then

sunburns suck!