What a day!

I would like tequila or a lobotomy please...

lots and lots of stuff to do today...wont be on much. will return the love later :)

good morning!

good night fu :)

It's always nice to be called Pretty in the morning. So what if he was hiding behind the trash wearing no pants.

can someone possibly reset my 11s?

Hangovers are nature's way of grounding you as an adult.

I swear my toddler yells at me in Vietnamese

In retrospect, I suppose "harder" wasn't the best choice of a safe word.

An elderly woman at an ATM asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over. Yup, she needs a walker.

Don’t run with scissors — unless you’re stealing scissors, of course. If so, run. Run like the wind scissor thief!

My gift horse is facing the wrong way

Guess what I saw today? ... Everything I looked at.

I prefer to call it a “Ta-Da” list. Cause it’d be amazing if I actually accomplished anything on it.

Sunday morning and the 4yr old is with gma, the 17yr old is at a friends, coffee is hot, music is loud, and for the first time in forever it feels like, i woke up without needing a pain pill. time to get this house back in order and maybe a lil mama boogie while i do it!

good morning!!!

OK time for bed... have a great night everyone

Accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to pull my blanket up, if that doesn't accurately describe my life I don't know what does

I finally stopped caring what other people think ... I hope everyone's ok with that.