Hello, childrens. Welcome to my Ministry...OF PAIN...and cookies. I hope you will all be very, very happy here AS I ANNIHILATE YOUR SOULS. Did you know that this Ministry was built on the love within my heart for all the little childrens just like you AND ON THE BONES OF MY ENEMIES. I would like to thank each and every one of you for coming here so that I could share my very very special message OF ETERNAL SUFFERING AND DESPAIR with each and every one of you.Now, I hope that we can all be very very special friends, don't you? It's easy. All you have to do is BOW TO THE WILL OF YOUR NEW GOD. See how easy that is? I knew you could!


I keep a good half-dozen online journals using different names and personalities. I think spending a year or so in a schizophrenic fugue-state unable to tell the difference between "now" and First-century Rome would be fucking fantastic. What I'm looking for is a literary high. Maybe I should just shoot up some bug-powder and then shoot my wife in the head. Fuck it, I could always hitchhike around the country for a while. Drugs are the answer, don't let anyone lie to you about THAT, my friend. Drugs to keep you calm, drugs to keep you hard-working, drugs to keep you from clawing out your own fucking eyeballs when you realise just what's become of your lif---ermn..sorry. Just say NO! Obviously, I read way too much, and have probably done too many drugs for you to be comfortable talking to me. I'm probably just some wacked-up burn-out who can't hold coherent thoughts any more. You just keep telling yourself that, my fine feathered friend, and we'll both laugh at the joke.

In all seriousness, there are a few points you should know about me.

I will give you the benefit of the doubt...once.
I will forgive you if you betray me...once.
I will turn a blind eye if you steal from me...once.
If you turn your back on me, I will ask you why...once.
If you let me down, I will laugh it off...once.


I am old, and I am wise, and I did not gain my years or my wisdom the easy way, the safe way, by watching others and not doing what they did wrong. I have my own scars, and earned every single one of them. If you feel you must cross me, then that is your choice. I won't swear eternal revenge, more than likely as not, I'll just take the hit and keep moving on, because I guarantee you that no matter what you do, I've alreayd been through worse, and it doesn't really bother me. If you feel you must do me a good turn, then that, also, is your choice. I can't promise that I'll spend the rest of my life showing gratitude or eternal love, especially if you do this good deed unasked. What I will say to both of these, is that I am patient, and I am cunning, and I can wait. So if you do me good, or if you do me evil, then one day, when I have the chance, which I may make for myself, or I may take when I see it, I will return the favor in as many spades as I can afford to at that moment.