From my Shows stash: CHRISTMAS PARTY
Sam had been in business for 25 years and is finally
sick of the stress. He quits his job and buys 50 acres
of land in Alaska as far from humanity as possible.

Sam sees the postman once a week and gets groceries once
a month.

Otherwise it's total peace and quiet. After six months
or so of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his
door. He opens it and there is a huge, bearded man standing
there.

"Name's Lars, your neighbor from forty miles up the road...

Having a Christmas party Friday night... Thought you might
like to come. About 5:00..."

"Great," says Sam, "after six months out here I'm ready to
meet some local folks. Thank you."

As Lars is leaving, he stops. "Gotta warn you... There's
gonna be some drinkin'.

"Not a problem," says Sam. "After 25 years in business,
I can drink with the best of em."

Again, as he starts to leave, Lars stops. "More 'n' likely
gonna be some fightin' too."

Sam says, "Well, I get along with people, I'll be alright.
I'll be there. Thanks again."

Once again Lars turns from the door. "More'n likely be
some wild sex, too."

"Now that's really not a problem," says Sam, warming to
the idea.

"I've been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there.
By the way, what should I wear?"

Lars stops in the door again and says, "Whatever you want.
Just gonna be the two of us."